The Sixth Year
by ovisnephele
Summary: Basically all the clones during their sixth year at Hogwarts. HP! timeline. Cophine. Mentions of Soccercop and others. Ignore the title it's very unimaginative. T for now may change later give it a try :)
1. Prologue

**I did something, aparently, and thought I'd share it with you. I haven't uploaded anything for a long time so I'm sorry if this sucks. English is not my first language so...again sorry...for the mistakes.**

**Ta-Ta and have fun, leave a review if you want to.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything Orphan Black nor Harry Potter related. They belong to BBC America and J.K. Rowling**

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The first time Cosima meets her she does not even know it is her until months later. It is the first day of her sixth year at Hogwarts and unlike her sisters she already manages it to be late. It does not help at all that her first class is on the other side of Hogwarts' ridiculously wide school grounds that she flies past in a whirl of black and white and blue, chest heaving and breath puffing in the already chill morning air.

More annoying than the pang in Cosima's side, that builds up slowly until it burns like dragon's fire, are the three shadows emerging from under the first trees that mark the line to the forbidden forest, a place where it is still night and dark and cold.

The Ravenclaw has barely time to look where she puts her feet but she has time for a quick prayer to Merlin that the three Slytherins would not bother her. Although Rachel and Allison are sporting the same green and silver as the striding head of the trio, looking paler than the Headless Nick in morning's twilight, Cosima's family has a problem with Slytherins and especially Draco Malfoy since day one.

On her third day in Hogwarts Sarah screamed bloody murder, ready to turn the other boy into a rat and throughout the years each of the five sisters had their fair share of Malfoy's skullduggeries, some of them lesser and with more grace than the others. Cosima is the one that gets the biggest share and takes it with the least grace of them all. She is glee and sunshine and full blown laughter all wrapped into her tiny body and it does not matter that the people around her do not understand her most of the time, she is liked by everyone, well almost.

Draco Malfoy hates her, never missing a chance to show her, just like on this morning, at which, apart from not wanting to be pushed around, Cosima has like zero time for him. But he picks on her relentlessly so when Cosima tries to rush past them, wishing that not even one of her long dreadlocks touches one of them, Goyle sends her crashing to green grass still wet from dawn's kisses.

She is a groaning and cursing heap on the ground the next second with her books scattered in every direction around her, the boys' laughter ringing in her ears like sirens.

Cheeks red with embarrassment and from her record sprint to Herbology, she is cursing and hissing, trying to snatch her homework on the correct use of valerian roots out of the first rays of piercing sunlight:

"Fuck. Shit. Bollocks!" she cries frustrated.

"Stumbled over your own two feet again, Niehaus?" Malfoy whickers a couple of yards away from her.

Pushing crumbled parchment back into her bag Cosima would like, very much, to tell him to fuck himself but she does not need more bruises, she already feels one forming on her hip.

"Oi, Niehaus! I'm talking to you!" Malfoy yells not liking being ignored, voice trying to sound dominant and aggressive and intimidating but Cosima only registers denied attention. It is not often that she is so annoyed or angry at the obnoxious boy that she stands up to him. Sarah and Helena do that for the whole lot of them. Today, though, her patience is thinner than the silk of his shirt:

"And you see I'm not talking to you!" she barks back at him still crouched on the grass, wetness and coldness already seeping through her stockings. The Ravenclaw realizes her mistake before she registers the blonde's face.

_Bad idea, Niehaus!_

One short look that lasts not longer than a heartbeat is passed between Malfoy and Goyle and Cosima abandons her books and clumsily crawls backwards. She is not sure he is actually going to hit her but Crabbe and Goyle have brains that house less intelligence than a jellyfish's and they do whatever they are ordered to. And Malfoy has a murderous look on his normally paper white face.

Cosima gives up on crawling, bravely preparing for the soon to come pain because, really, everything else would look quite pathetic and she has dignity. Nonetheless she shuts her eyes tight when she feels Goyle's shoe touching hers.

A sudden very disturbing, very girly shriek makes her open them again a second later because she is sure she is not the one sounding like a five year old girl, the three boys are. Their eyes are glued to Cosima's left, comically grimaces on their faces, looking one hundred percent ready to pee themselves. The situation is not appropriate, it is never appropriate to laugh at him but the sound is already bubbling up her throat, ready to escape her mouth in a small giggle at the sight of Malfoy shitting his pants.

Then she looks too, eyes peering from under her thick glasses and her heartbeat is a bad dancer staggering out of its rhythm, her fleeting happiness dying on her lips.

In all of the soft morning light's glory stands a giant wolf its fur glowing like liquid gold.

The view is breathtakingly beautiful and enchanting and utterly terrifying. Cosima's breath staggers in her lungs as if it is as afraid as her, making her choke and highly reconsidering her pride and crawling backwards on all fours.

Even more so as the giant beast pads slowly closer to their little group completely aware of the affect it has on them and its absolute superiority while Cosima's brain is scared into some kind shock unable to tell that her she's a witch and Malfoy looks way beyond frightened, clearly not able to remember where he put his wand.

The closer the wild animal gets the bigger it looks from Cosima's position, she's sure, although she has trouble breathing, that the wolf would reach her hip would she be standing. From her position it looks as big as a giant, albeit like a beautiful majestic giant. Despite of the terror making her small form tremble the teenaged girl is in complete awe over what she sees. She is a child of science, loving to pick apart the molecular reasons for DNA replication, learning and adoring how the combination of different chemical elements can create new things and which biochemical transmitter fits which receptor but she is a child of nature too, believing that they are two inseparable forces in the world, one always being part of the other. Science is often able to leave her speechless with its endless possibilities and its complexity but today nature knocked the air right out of her body.

Cosima blinks rapidly at the tall animal, refocusing on the reality around her and is equally relieved and disappointed that the wolf doesn't seem to have any interest in her. Its big rich brown orbs full of thousand colors, like its iris never could settle for only one, are directed at Goyle with an intensity Cosima can feel from where she sits on the ground.

The growl sounds like the rumble of thunder in nights so terrifying that Cosima and her four sisters slept in the same bed and as powerful as a forbidden curse. The Ravenclaw is surprised that Goyle is still standing, not yet having the decency to faint. When the wolf growls again long and threatening, baring its long sharp fangs, he reels and dashes as fast as possible away from Cosima crying at the top of his lungs. Malfoy and Crabbe don't waste another second and follow, being the ones stumbling over their own feet now.

This time Cosima cannot help herself but grins widely, chuckling softly to herself, staring after the retreating Slytherins. But at the sound the wolf twitches its big ears and turns its massive head to her. Her laughter fades away, the last note of a soft piano piece and her breath gets lost in the darkness of her chest again, though for entirely different reasons. The wolf's beauty is so radiating Cosima wants to bask in it like in warm sunlight on the first day of spring. She inhales carefully when the beast comes closer to her, its steps even more cautiously as if it doesn't want Cosima to be scared.

Cosima is completely unable to move even as the wolf's paws reach her shins she is glued to the grass, to this spot, to this moment unable to grasp the reality of it all, completely unaware of the fact that she might get bitten. When the wolf comes nearer still, four paws on either side of her body now, she lets her body fall backwards accepting to be pinned to the soft grass, the rush of her own blood in her ears, drowning out every other sound around her.

She gets hypnotized by swirls of brown and gold, ready to drown in them without feeling sorry. Cosima does not believe in souls and even less in animals having souls but in the wolf's gaze is a depth she has never seen before neither in another animal nor in another human. Then a wet muzzle touches her cheek, hot breath making her shiver and then the moment is gone along with its enchanting creature.

Cosima can finally breathe again not thinking at all how late she will be for Herbology.

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**tbc.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Here's the next chapter, sans strange puppies. Feel free to stay, read and review. **** Sorry for any mistakes**

**Ta-Ta.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Orphan Black or Harry Potter. They belong to BBC America and J.K. Rowling.**

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It is several weeks later, summer finally bidding the world good-bye as October comes around with the first harsh cold. Cosima has not told anyone of what transpired the first morning between her and Malfoy and the wolf. Sometimes she thinks it must have been a dream but the way Malfoy does not even dare to look at her makes her think otherwise. Although this is a nice side-effect Cosima feels kind of haunted ever since. Her mind is not yet challenged by school related things so she finds herself often daydreaming when she is together with her siblings or friends, trying to remember the meeting in front of the forbidden forest as detailed as possible. 

When she is not daydreaming she feels like she is being watched, studied, her body giving off warning signs she cannot interpret because she sees no danger, though she swears she saw eyes in thousand shades of brown and gold amongst the mass of students almost every day.

One afternoon after lunch she was so sure she saw the alluring colours between some Slytherins that she ran straight into a portrait, hanging on the wall in front of her. At the time she finished apologizing to the group of old nuns living in the picture, the possibility of the thing she was so desperately after, of course, was already swallowed again by the castle.

As she lay awake at night Cosima considered her actions and thoughts and declared them as silly. She was incredibly lucky to be alive, that the wolf didn't bite her head off and she must not keep constantly searching for a pair of eyes that belonged to an animal that probably was far gone by now anyway.

There was so much going on in the magical world since the return of the most dangerous wizard ever that she chided herself for her drifting thoughts. Over the summer Deatheaters began to crawl out of their old hide-outs to terrorize wizards and muggles alike once again, people disappeared daily, she never saw the Diagon Alley so void of life except for _Weasleys Wizard Wheezes _of course and for certain the train-ride back to Hogwarts has never been so serious. It was like someone cast a spell over the school itself, making everyone antsy for their lack of knowledge and the constant thread that settled into every last of the castle's wedges and cracks like fine dust. Neither the new safety rules and the four Aurors nor all the fuss about Harry Potter being the chosen one could give Cosima any feeling of being protected against what was lurking outside the high walls or what was likely to come inside to them sooner or later. The words of Dumbledore's speech on the evening of their arrival still fresh in her head.

She decided to forget all about the wolf and distract herself with a new biological field she stumbled across last summer in one of her mother's muggle books. It was better than constantly thinking about the war raging on outside Hogwarts' safe haven. She didn't want to forget about it thus that would be ignorant and dump alike but she didn't want to feel like a constant coward either, so she turned to science for help.

Immunology fascinates the young student so much that she read all the books she could find so far but her booty had been unsatisfying since the magical world doesn't care that much about muggle biology. Nonetheless she hoped to find some books about it in Hogwarts' well-stocked library and against all odds she dug out several volumes about immunology in general and its history on the first day she looked for them.

Her only problem is that she cannot find them again. She is in the library with Allison and Rachel for the third time this week arguing for the hundredth time in the last couple of days with Madame Pince over the lost books.

"I swear I put them at the exact same place where I took them from!" Cosima exclaims annoyed and a little too loud. There is not much that makes Cosima raise her voice at least not like this.

She gets happy-loud on a lot of occasions because of her sisters because of Quidditch and because of science, she gets scared-loud sometimes because Helena scares the shit out of her every Halloween and sometimes the clap of thunder in very dark nights booms louder in her head than a canon and she gets sad-loud because when a girl breaks your heart you don't care how loud your sobs are but she never gets angry-loud. Not like this, but she needs to get herself back together and she needs these damn books.

Madame Pince's answer is not more than a sneer:

"Then it shouldn't be so hard to find them, should it?"

"Can't you like find them with magic?" Cosima huffs, her tone almost pleading, voice sprinkled with anger, yet.

Madame Pince only looks at her sternly over the rim of her glasses:

"Someone must have taken them while I wasn't here." The nerdy teenager rants on: "All five books on Immunology are gone…right when I want to read them!"

The librarian's scowl gets even darker, the lines on her face even deeper and Cosima half fears to be kicked out when she hears a soft voice behind her:

"Do you mean these?"

The accent is heavy on _you_ and _these_, making the words sound a little clumsy while they are floating between the bookshelves like forbidden music. Cosima whips around, ready to unleash the wrath of her still very undistracted mind but her anger blows out the instant her eyes land on the person behind her.

The first thing Cosima sees are big pools of melted chocolate, looking at her and a shy smile playing on the girl's pale lips that makes heat rush to her cheeks and her stomach to feel all funny. She is taller than Cosima even though she leans against one of the bookshelves and is not standing straight, in her arms five books of various sizes. She puts a hand through her wild mane of golden locks but they do not stay where she wants them, bouncing right back into place and Cosima thinks the little annoyed glance the girl gives her own hair is very cute. Sensing that she is not able to tame her hair the girl brushes her hand down a dark-red woolen sweater before she pushes it inside the pocket of her black trousers. Brown eyes lock with Cosima's again and eventually she remembers that the girl asked her something:

"Wha…?"

"The books…" the girl repeats accompanied by another small smile:

"Are these the one you want…yeah…about Immunology?"

Cosima is never at a loss of words, her fast mind always finding some for everything but right now they come by very hard and it makes her feel very awkward.

"Uhm…I dunno…let me have a look?" she finally manages to stutter in tune with her jumping heart.

The other girl nods, locks falling in her face again, a veil of golden strands.

"I was just sitting down…would you like to…," she falters briefly, perfectly shaped eyebrows drawing together then her face relaxes again when she finds the correct word. "Accompany me?"

Cosima has her overstuffed bag already slung over her shoulder and her waiting sisters never seemed less important than now when she has the opportunity to spend a little more time with this beautiful stranger. She shrugs:

"Sure." And sends a toothy grin through the still air.

As they sit down next to each other at one of the small tables, facing one of the large windows, milky sunlight draws surreal patterns on the old wood.

"You're French or something?" Cosima asks, remembering the way the Beauxbatons girls spoke when she met them two years ago during the Triwizard Tournament.

There's a twinkle in the blonde's eyes and a very faint redness to her cheeks:

"Does my accent show that much?"

She wonders while she dumps the books on the table.

"Obvs…and the word searching." Cosima beams, all pointy teeth and tongue in her cheek.

Her stranger steals a glance at her from under long lashes, a wide smile plastered all over her face, long, slender fingers dividing the air above the small mountain of books:

"Delphine." She says in a voice as sensual as the rest of her being.

"Cosima." She answers with a tilt of her head, shaking the offered hand, feeling a jolt travelling from the tips of her fingers where they brush over Delphine's soft skin all the way to her heart.

"Enchantée. "

This time it sounds smooth and soft.

"Enchantée." Cosima repeats her tongue not used to pronounce such liquid words.

"I am very much French." Delphine says when they open the first book together.

Cosima only smiles and smiles and smiles, thinking that Hogwarts wasn't going to be such a dreadful place this year after all.

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**tbc.**


	3. Chapter 2

**Next chapter up. Hope after this you have a general idea of where this story might be going. If it's going anywhere at all.**

**I trie to stick more to the HP!books but sometimes I mix the information with something from the movies. If you read something that is clearly wrong in either the book- or movie-universe, or in both, please tell me.**

**Feel free to leave a review.**

**Ta-Ta.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Orphan Black or Harry Potter. They belong to BBC America and J.K. Rowling.**

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They spent the rest of the afternoon together, learning that both of them are very enamored with muggle science and magic science and really every form of science they ever encountered.

Cosima never before met someone with whom she could be this passionate, hands flying, drawing million invisible lines in the air between them, eyes wide and shining and sparkling, gasping for air because there are too many words flowing out of her mouth, there is no space for a breath.

And Delphine is just as passionate as her when she explains in the most adoringly way how incredible fast some toxins were able to disturb the protein-biosynthesis or when being proteases destroying proteins directly, though her hands are calmer than Cosima's, weaving slowly through the empty space, eyes gleaming just as much as the Ravenclaw's, stumbling over foreign words mixing them together with more familiar French words.

More than once Delphine uses words that do not belong in her sentence, pronouncing them like they are a dance and English is not a dancing language, more of a fight and Cosima repeats them and laughs and laughs some more at Delphine's heavy blushing cheeks and embarrassed smile. She doesn't point out Delphine's mistakes or makes fun of them, she laughs because she is happy, because the French's imperfection is beauty and trying.

When there shines no light anymore through the window, the only patterns left on the table are the ones they created there with their fingers, Delphine suddenly jumps in her seat a hand flying to her chest.

Cosima stares curiously as Delphine pulls on a fine golden necklace she hasn't noticed before, revealing a golden pocket watch on its end. Delphine's face crumbles a bit, brows furrowed, expression heavy and dark in the blink of an eye. She slides the watch back under her sweater away from Cosima's eyes and says:

"Merde…Cosima…I have to go." She sounds honestly sad.

Cosima already expected that much but she can't fight the disappointment that washes over her and the sound that escapes her:

"Oh…"

Hurriedly putting parchment, notes and quill in her bag Delphine gives her more apologetic glances:

"I am very sorry. But I cannot be late."

Cosima stands up too one hand rubbing her neck, trying to hide how much she doesn't want the other girl to leave:

"It's okay…don't want you to be late for whatevs…" she tries to shrug it off.

Delphine lingers a bit after she put all her things away stepping closer to Cosima whose pulse goes up, up, up without her wanting to:

"I had a lot of fun with you, Cosima."

Her smile and the way she emphasizes the last syllable of her name and not the first makes Cosima melt:

"Yeah…me too…obvs." She breathes.

Delphine's eyes fall down a moment then they lock with Cosima's again, uncertainty the most prominent colour in them now:

"Maybe…we could meet again, oui? Tomorrow?"

The doubt pools away the second Cosima's face lights with a broad grin:

"Yeah! Totally! That'd be cool."

They decide to meet in front of the Great Hall after lunch since both of them have no afternoon classes and before Delphine rushes away in a flurry of gold and red she calls over her shoulder:

"Do not steal my books!"

Cosima sticks her tongue out:

"You stole them first."

After Delphine skipped around the last bookshelf and is out of sight Cosima sinks down in her chair and lets out a long breath.

"Man…"

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Cosima doesn't see the French girl for the rest of the day even though she guided her steps through half the castle and at dinner she is unusually quiet. She sits at one of the lesser crowded Gryffindor tables with her sisters and absentmindedly pushes the food around on her plate. Sarah sits opposite her already finished with her meal and eyes her curiously:

"What's up, Cos?" she asks pushing her plate aside.

Cosima waves her hand accompanied by a jingle from her bracelets and mutters:

"Oh nothing…nothing."

Allison, her own plate clean and put aside says:

"Please, Cosima, you are never this silent."

"Only when she has book." Helena chimes in between two mouthfuls of red jell-o.

Putting the Daily-Prophet down even Rachel comments on Cosima's quietness:

"Even I have to admit the lack of your constant chattering is pretty rare."

Cosima throws her cutlery down and huffs:

"Are you like ganging up on me now? And don't pretend to be interested Rachel 'cause you're not!" she points a finger at her older sister accusingly. The blonde shrugs, picks up the newspaper again and calmly sips her tea. Helena is already back to her dessert but Cosima has no such luck with her remaining two siblings:

"Come on, man, something's clearly bothering you. Malfoy's been a bloody bastard again?" Sarah asks, head already turning towards the Slytherin table.

"Sarah! Language!" Allison gasps.

"Oh shut up!" Sarah says, rolling her eyes and Cosima almost thinks she is off the hook and that her sisters' daily banter saves her.

Instead of letting herself get riled up by Sarah's behavior Allison turns to her dreadlocked sister:

"Cosima, you don't have to tell us if it makes you really uncomfortable but maybe we can help and make it better."

Cosima grumbles:

"Yeah…sure."

She doesn't want to tell, doesn't want to say it out loud, though she thought about it since Delphine disappeared from the library and she knows denying this doesn't make it better anyway. She gets very shy, shoulders slumped, dreadlocks spilling over her shoulder, pushing her glasses, fiddling with her hands before she mumbles:

"I think I have a crush."

She practically hears Sarah's mouth fall open and Allison's squeak is unmistakable but it is Helena who says something first:

"Are you going to cry again, seestra? "

Normally Helena does not bother much for any of them except Sarah and her soft tone touches Cosima:

"I don't know…I hope not." She answers with a small smile.

Apparently that is enough for her sibling but not for her other sisters:

"Do you think that is wise after what happened last year?" Rachel wants to know, never one to be tactfully or considerate.

"Thanks for reminding her about that bitch Megan." Sarah exclaims shooting Rachel a dirty look.

Megan Jones was the girlfriend Cosima had last year and it ended in a total disaster.

Allison puts a comforting hand on Cosima's shoulder and tells her in a warm voice:

"Don't listen to them. Sarah is right she wasn't…kind to you."

"Kind?" Sarah repeats hotly. "She cheated on, Cos!"

"That's enough!" Cosima decides and gives all of her siblings pointed looks. "It's long over…I'm good. No need to worry about that." And surely she is _very good _when images of Delphine's magical hair and smile appear in her head.

Sarah has a grin smeared across her face and Allison barely keeps her excitement at bay:

"So…who's the chick?" Sarah asks poking Cosima's shin under the table with the tip of her boot.

"Is she in our grade? In which house is she?" Allison all but bounces in her seat.

Suddenly it dawns on Cosima that she can answer neither of her sisters' questions.

"Uhm…" she starts slightly embarrassed, hands knotted tightly together:

"I don't know, Allison." She admits a bit mortified that she only caught Delphine's name all afternoon, being too caught up in science to ask the other girl anything else.

"How come you don't know?" Sara asks baffled.

"I met her at the library today. She was the one who stole my books." Cosima shrugs.

"So that is where you disappeared to." Allison says with an annoyed undertone.

"Yeah…so sorry for that…but I got caught up." Cosima grins unashamed.

Sexuality was never an issue in her life, neither in the household she lived in as a kid nor in the one where she lives now. Coming out to her siblings was very important to Cosima and when all four of them were either not bothered by it or genuinely happy and okay with it she knew society could kiss her arse with her siblings on her side. So talking about the slowly manifesting romantic feelings she probably developed for Delphine in the span of one afternoon makes her spirits lift again.

"If you don't know then tell us how she is. She's like hella hot?" Sarah wiggles her eyebrows and Cosima snorts:

"Hella. You bet."

"Please tell me you don't crush on the poor girl only because of her looks?" Allison asks appalled hand flying to her neck.

"Allison!" Cosima feigns being offended: "How can you possibly think that?"

Her sister glares at her and Cosima is eventually able to flash a grin again:

"Nah…man I don't…although she is really gorgeous and has the craziest hair and beautiful smile and she's like a total geek and we dorked out all day on Immunology...muggle science...and she likes potions…like me…and oh god, don't get me started on the accent." Cosima bubbles happily.

"What kind of accent?" Helena wants to know, her own Ukrainian accent heavy as smoke.

"Didn't I say that? She's French!" Cosima giggles.

Cosima is unaware of the skeptical look Allison and Sarah exchange as she finally digs into her dinner that has long become cold:

"Uh…Cos." Sarah starts but gets interrupted from Rachel:

"French? It is a very odd time for French exchange students, don't you think?" she says, sliding the folded Daily-Prophet between her siblings.

On the first page are pictures and names printed from various witches and wizards all missing or dead or something in between.

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**tbc. (?)**


	4. Chapter 3

**Ehpoca** **this one is for you and the other two chapters for your very kind, very much appreciated review. I hope you like it :)**

**To the rest I hope you enjoy. Feel free to leave a review.**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything Orphan Black or Harry Potter related. They belong to BBC America and J.K. Rowling**

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Cosima barely slept last night what resulted in her being late for yet another lesson. In her defense the thoughts that kept her awake through most of the dark hours were as severe as they could get for a sixteen-year-old witch. After last night's dinner she was seriously troubled by the conversation with her four sisters, leave it to Rachel to destroy her good mood with one sentence. They parted silently and while Cosima climbed the many steps to the Ravenclaw common room her head reeled with thoughts about the war and Delphine, all jumbled together in a dizzy mess that gave her a headache.

The Daily-Prophet reminded the five of them all too well of what went on beyond Hogwarts' borders and although Rachel and Sarah did everything not to show it, Cosima knows her sisters long enough now to see right through them and Allison tried very hard to keep it together and Helena's head was in an entirely different place than reality, they were all scared in one way or another.

They are scared for their foster mother Ms. S. a pub owner who lives in Tinworth, who took them all in when they turned 11 and they are scared for little Felix who lives a stone's throw away from them and for the muggle families they left behind. Allison is scared of shattered dreams full of children and a house with a picket fence, Rachel is scared because the war is a thing even she cannot be pristine about, Helena because it means blood and violence and she already has a very disturbed relationship to both and Sarah because she hates it all and cannot change it.

Cosima is scared for her own hopes and dreams for the future and for the horrible course their lives could very possibly take, pushing them head first in a world full of terror and dread and pain they gladly never had to experience before. Her personal, utterly selfish fear, though, is how in all this chaos erupting around them one certain girl made its way half across Europe into the library.

Last night, staring at the ceiling of her four-poster bed where the constellations softly glimmered she hexed there in her second year, she had to admit that Rachel was right about Delphine.

It _was_ a very odd time for exchange students indeed her head told her but her heart wasn't sure it wanted the French to be anything else than just that. Tossing and turning she was unable to decide whether she should ask Delphine what brought her to Scotland or if she should damn it all and keep the little bubble the other girl created for her floating a little longer. When she eventually, finally fell into a restless sleep Delphine's smile was the first thing that greeted her.

* * *

Now she rubs her tired eyes, shifting from one foot to the other in front of the Great Hall that is almost empty. During lunch Allison told them that it was likely to be the last nice day before spring at which Sarah cursed loudly since she had _Defence Against the Dark Arts _with Snape in the next hour and was very tempted not to go.

The tips of the trees shielding them from the outside-world are already turning a deep ruby red, the air barely warm enough to sit on the, constantly getting colder, ground, the sun fighting a never ending battle against the fog that rolled in from the lakeside. It was a perfect day to suck up the remaining warmth, being nothing but lazy, stretched out on the soft grass.

Deep in thought due to the new assignment she got in _Arithmancy _this morningCosima doesn't see Delphine until she's right in front of her. The geeky Ravenclaw almost stumbles backwards by surprise, mentally shaking herself for her clumsiness:

"Hey, Delphine!" she greets the other girl all thoughts on homework quickly forgotten.

"Hey…Bonjour, Cosima." She greets back smiling so wide it shows her teeth.

She is still in her school uniform, blouse all button upped as white as snow, plaid black skirt and knee-high boots, though Cosima instantly recognizes that the tie around her neck bears no colours just like her gown. There is nothing on her that clearly identifies her as a member of one the four houses, making the Ravenclaw raise her eyebrows in wonder.

It is then that she finally decides to ask Delphine, if she only could calm down her flattering nerves. It is tougher than she wants it to be but she is _Cosima effing Niehaus_ she can talk to anyone.

"So do you want to go to the library again?" Delphine asks waving a hand in the opposite direction of where the library is located.

They both cast glances at each other and through the open door, revealing dozens of students already occupying the lawn. Cosima doesn't know how long they are allowed to do this anymore, being outside during daytime, so she shakes her head, emitting a soft tinkle from the various beads she put in her hair:

"No…not today…it's far too nice outside. We could just hang-out or chill…or you help me with my homework it totally sucks….or just…whatever you want." She sputters, giving her best at not to sound as nervous as she feels.

Delphine laughs and shakes her head at her:

"I can barely understand all the words for my own homework…and you want me to help you, c'est vrai?"

"No clue what the last thing means…but I bet when I tell you all the words you totally know what to write." Cosima shrugs.

"Maybe…although I would like it more to," then her face crunches up in this adorable way while she tries to come up with the correct word:

"I would like to chill with you." She finishes proudly.

"No prob!"

On an impulse Cosima links her arm with Delphine's as she practically drags her out into the sun, heart jumping in her throat when Delphine bumps their shoulders together, clinging onto her.

On their way to a spot a little more secluded they pass Sarah and Cal Morrison, a following Gryffindor lounging near the lake, shirts hanging loosely around their shoulders, using their bags as pillows. In the distance Cosima spots Rachel and Paul Dierden looking the complete opposite of the other couple both sporting green and silver ties around their necks and when they finally pass Allison and Elizabeth Childs, pretending to be cloud-gazing, when Allison actually tries to free Beth from the yellow-black ribbon around her neck, Cosima eventually is satisfied and drops her beg under a small tree whose small crown allows enough sunlight to pass through and warm the ground beneath.

They sit there, right on a patch of soft light, close, like yesterday but not as close as Cosima wants it to be and fall directly into the same type of conversation as before. As much as the Ravenclaw wants to go on and on about potions with Delphine the lack of red or blue or green or yellow on the French's clothes keep distracting her, reminding her that she is on a mission today.

"Delphine?" she mumbles softly into the comfortable silence, eyes fixed on Delphine's nails, painted the same burgundy red as the leaves.

"Quoi?" the blonde wonders, lifting her head from _A Guide to Advanced Transfiguration. _

Cosima gulps, rolls her shoulders and says:

"In which house are you?"

At first it looks like the blonde has absolutely no idea what Cosima is talking about, eyes wide and questioning, lips slightly apart but slowly, very slowly realization dawns on her. Her eyes fall to Cosima's neck, to her admittedly very loosely knotted tie in dark-blue and faint silver and to the Ravenclaw crest on the left side of her chest.

"I…I have no house, yet."

Delphine finally admits and her voice conveys the sadness she tries to hide from Cosima by looking away with a kind of longing in her eyes that is entirely foreign to the Ravenclaw because she always had a house. It means shelter, belonging and home and she cannot imagine what it must be like, being in Hogwarts without a house.

She should not ask because it feels like prying but she has always been too inquisitively for her own good and she wants so desperately to know more about the other girl she takes whatever information she get as long as Delphine willingly gives it to her:

"Why?" Cosima asks, her eyes dancing all over Delphine's face, trying to burn the image of her hair glowing in the setting sun deep into her mind as the image of something else glowing golden flashes before her eyes. But it is just a flutter, a sliver of a memory she cannot grasp and it is quickly forgotten.

Eventually Delphine turns back to her with an earnest face, no twinkle in her eyes only the sincerity of the moment:

"They do not know for how long I can stay here…Professor McGonagall…she says times are dangerous and she does not know if she has time now for the…difficulties I come with."

The answer sends a jolt of fear through Cosima and she sits up straighter, shuffles closer to Delphine afraid that she might vanish the next second:

"What do you mean? Where would you go? What difficulties?" Cosima asks, on her knees, hands in front of her, almost touching Delphine's outstretched leg, the shock in her words louder than the words themselves. Delphine sighs and buries her face in one hand, casting a sideway glance at her and a wary smile:

"You have so many questions, Cosima."

Cosima has nothing to say in response to that and keeps staring at the uncomfortable girl in front of her:

"They are not going to kick me out…at least not yet." The blonde finally answers dropping her hand in her lap.

It is not a satisfying answer but is seems the Ravenclaw is not given more today.

"So…where'd you sleep?" she asks one final question, her back resting against the tree's bark right next to Delphine's.

"With the Huffelpuffs."

"And…you like it?" Cosima questions and promptly earns a chuckle.

"Am I being interrogated?" the French retorts playfully kicking Cosima's shoe with hers.

"No…course not." The geeky teen smiles back quickly turning more serious:

"I just like….I wanna get to know you." She mumbles speaking truthfully.

She jumps a bit when Delphine pokes her in the side:

"That is very nice of you…and yeah I like it. It is…comment c'est dit…cozy." She finishes.

"It is close to the ground…close to the earth." Delphine whispers quietly, slender fingers skimming over the grass they are sitting on.

Cosima doesn't quite complete her self-imposed mission today, having more questions than before even more as Delphine hurriedly bits her good-bye again just before the sunset turns into dusk but she got to spend time with the blonde and that is worth about everything.

Right before Delphine leaves Cosima asks:

"You got a last name, too?"

Delphine looks at her like saying _really_ and grins:

"Cormier. And you?"

"Niehaus."

"Adieu, Cosima Niehaus." Delphine says with a little wave.

"Bye, Delphine Cormier."

At least she got her full name today.

* * *

**Very sorry for the mistakes.**

**tbc.**


	5. Chapter 4

**Here the next one. Hope you like it.**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: As aforementioned.**

* * *

The next couple of days the girls spent a lot of time together, gradually growing closer during long hours in the library, stolen glances in the only class they share and sacred moments in the corridors so short they are bordering on being unfair. Cosima doesn't bombard Delphine with more questions, realizing she was coming to know everything when the time was right for it, demanding herself to be patient, to be worth of the information Delphine is not ready to give, yet. They spend almost every afternoon together sadly only inside the castle because finally the weather changed and they cannot sit outside anymore, she thinks the Aurors would not let them anyway.

Over parchment, quills, bags, chocolate frogs and books Delphine tells her excitedly that Professor McGonagall decided to make her change common rooms every week and when she was familiar with each of them she would be able to choose where she wanted to stay for the remaining time. Cosima cannot believe that the blonde gets this unique chance to explore all four common rooms feels both excited for the other girl and slightly jealous and she practically begs Delphine to tell her everything , where they are, how they are decorated, the solution to the riddles and to play some pranks on the Slytherins.

Delphine points a finger at her:

"You are so cheeky! I cannot do that."

Cosima smiles smugly and confident and it is good to feel like that around the mysterious girl, confident not smug, though:

"You like it!"

Delphine stares at her completely serious and honest and it makes Cosima shiver in the best possible ways:

"I do."

* * *

They sit together in an alcove one day when Delphine tells her about France and Beauxbatons, how it never gets as cold there as it does in Hogwarts and that she starts to shiver only by looking at Cosima in her colourful tank-tops and short dresses. That everything in Beauxbatons looks like an impressionistic painting, soft and unfocused like a Monet, that they are raised differently than Cosima and the other students without rivalry between non-existent houses. Cosima tells her all about Hogwarts, the adventures she encountered in this castle, about all the things that happened since she came here five years ago, that Harry Potter is the cause of half the disaster in this school every year and she goes on and on about _Dumbledore's Army _and the amazing things she learnt in their underground rebel-group and of course she talks a lot about her sisters.

They never run out of things to talk about, the two of them, exchanging ideas, theories, points-of-view, like breath between them, on things so much bigger than them, they can hardly grasp their whole meaning or on things as silly as their favorite flavour of _Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans_ or their favorite muggle scientist.

* * *

Cosima is even more in awe of Delphine as she discovers later that week that her hair really is crazy and magical and changes its appearance whenever Delphine encounters a highly emotional situation or maybe, simply when she gets scared.

The nerdy Ravenclaw, like always in a rush to get to her next class, almost misses Delphine in the corridor where the foreign student stares, completely lost to the world, out of a window. She can't help herself, sneaks up to the other girl and buries her fingers in the French's sides.

The high-pitched yelp she gets already makes her laugh but when she looks at Delphine again she doubles over, clutching her sides, trying not to choke herself on laughter and tears. Delphine's locks are gone, hair falling past her shoulders now and as white as a ghost her eyes so round and big she reminds Cosima of a very small, very cute puppy.

The next second Cosima gets hit on her shoulders with parchment, the French's hair morphing back into tousled, golden locks in front of her eyes:

"That was not funny, Cosima!" she gets scolded.

Between belly-deep laughs Cosima shrieks happily:

"I scared the locks out of you!"

They bond and it makes Cosima incredibly happy, though it gets harder and harder every day to hide her growing attraction in front of the stunning blonde.

* * *

In the library there is no chair between them anymore as they sit hunched over books, thighs occasionally brushing together when one of them shifts because their muscles got sore, fingers touching when they point to an especially interesting passage at the same time, no, there actually is not any space left between them. No space for thoughts on where this relationship is going or _what-ifs_, or anything else that is not _them_, the intimacy of their proximity increasing daily.

It makes Cosima hear her pulse rushing in her ears as loud as Delphine's voice, makes her heart inflate like a balloon full of feelings she has no name for and she blushes, faintly in the colour of pink roses or as deep and bold as Gryffindor-red, more times than ever in her young life. The only thing, really the only thing that makes this better for the nervous Ravenclaw is the way Delphine's skin, her chest, her cheekbones, the tips of her ears along with her hair, display more shades of red than she could count, giving her the very strong impression that she is not the only one who feels like being pushed over the edge straight into…whatever this thing is that blossoms between them.

* * *

It is a cloudy Saturday morning and Cosima discusses the newest war developments with her sisters. Through rumors and the Daily-Prophet they came to know that Hannah Abbott's mother was killed a couple of days ago and since they have not seen the Huffelpuff since the beginning of the week and Beth tells them she was crying for hours before she packed her trunk, they do not take this as a mere rumor anymore but a terrible truth. Another Huffelpuff got ordered home by her parents and Sarah thinks the Patel-twins will be the next ones to leave.

"Bloody cowards!" Sarah barks at no one in particular aiming her anger at her breakfast, spreading bread-crumbs and bacon all around her in an attempt to eat and stay mad at the same time.

"I don't understand why they are leaving. Hogwarts is the safest place in all of Great Britain." Allison says irritated, tapping her nails on the folded newspaper that lies on the table. In Cosima's ears it sounds like she is not really convinced by that line herself.

"At least we have Dumbledore." She sighs, picking imaginary crumbs off her pink sweater.

"The headmaster has not been here this week." Helena mumbles before she squishes a whole egg into her mouth. The blonde curly head is very observing almost constantly aware of her surroundings, though no one wants to give her credit for it. They think she does not understand the world around her only because she often speaks in riddles and behaves childlike. Unlike her sisters who know that Helena is her own, unique kind of special and they are more than grateful for it. If it was not for Helena, Walden Mcnair would have killed Sarah last year during their battle in the _Ministry of Magic_ alongside Harry Potter and other _DA_ members.

"What if we don't?" Cosima ponders glancing, like the others, at the vacated headmaster's chair.

"Maybe the old man has better things to do or thinks we should be able to defend ourselves." Rachel states taking the Daily-Prophet from under Allison's hand and unfolds it.

"He would not leave us all alone! He cannot!" Allison exclaims real fear written all over her face.

Sarah turns to her, probably to tell her to not shit her pants or something along that line but suddenly her eyebrows rise in surprise.

Cosima looks over shoulder, following her sister's gaze and instantly feels much better, very much less frightened as she sees Delphine walking up to them.

"Salut, Cosima." Delphine greets her, face half hidden behind a scarf, her body invisible under a long black coat.

"Hey! Uhm…I hope the first was a nice word." The Ravenclaw jokes.

Delphine rolls her eyes:

"It means _hello_, silly."

"Yeah…cool…just checking." Cosima grins from ear to ear.

A slight cough from behind her reminds the dreadlocked witch that possibly all of her sisters are staring at her and Delphine.

"Errrmmmm…Delphine…guess it's time you meet my siblings." Cosima says, flapping her left hand in the direction of her sisters.

The blonde's eyebrows furrow as she follows Cosima's hand. The next moment she jumps slightly and gasps:

"Mon Dieu!"

"That's the shock moment…guess we'll be talking later to her." Sarah laughs in Cosima's face.

"May I suggest much later." Rachel says and looks in the other direction to where Harry Potter and Ronald Weasly have just risen from the table, clad in their Quidditch uniforms.

"Shite!" Sarah curses loudly before she pushes the remains of her toast in her mouth, already scrambling away from the table. The rest of the quintuplet is not in such a hurry, Cosima still trying to coax Delphine out of her stupor while Helena storages two handful of eggs in her parker:

"Maybe I throw them at others. So seestra will get place on team." She smiles happily at Rachel who looks rather disgusted at her older twin.

"Hey…Delphine?" Cosima asks softly, hand waving in front of the blonde's face. The French blinks a couple of times still staring at Allison, Rachel and Helena.

"You forgot to mention you are twins." Delphine huffs eventually, brown orbs flickering between the four siblings.

"Oh…whoops." Cosima smirks only a little bit embarrassed:

"Although you can't tell me you never ran across one of them before. We're five…the castle is not big enough to avoid all of us."

"I am still staying with the Huffelpuffs so I do can tell you." Delphine retorts.

Cosima does not dwell on the thought that what Delphine is saying implies she shares no classes with either of her four sisters. It is an odd time for exchange students.

"Cos, you're coming?" Allison calls for her, already halfway to the entrance portal, hands linked with Beth Childs who is talking animatedly to Arthur Bell.

"You want to see Sarah getting into Gryffindor's Quidditch team?" Cosima asks without thinking twice.

"Mais, oui." Delphine nods, beaming smile plastered on her face.

"I have no clue what you just said." The Ravenclaw chuckles but grabs Delphine's hand anyway and drags her out of the castle.

* * *

**tbc**.


	6. Chapter 5

**And the last one for today...at least I think it will be. Hope you enjoy. Feel free to leave a review.**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: As aforementioned.**

* * *

Delphine blows hot breath in her cupped hands for the third time now and rubs them together in an attempt to warm them.

"You can't possibly be that cold." Cosima chuckles sitting right next to her on the wooden bench, leg and shoulder being warmer than the rest of her body where they touch Delphine's.

Eventually the blonde gives up and puts her hands between her thighs to keep them from getting any colder.

"I told you it never gets this cold in Beauxbatons." Delphine sniffles slightly shuffling even closer to Cosima.

The Ravenclaw barely hears a word too occupied imagining what it would feel like if her hands were between the French's thighs. The pressure in her lower abdomen and the sudden heat she feels under her red woolen coat tell her to immediately think about something else, though, or this training match could turn into a lesson of willpower Cosima rather not wants to participate in.

"Damn hormones!" she grumbles under her breath but it is still loud enough so the shivering girl beside her can hear it:

"Did you say something?" Delphine tries to catch her eyes.

The Ravenclaw stiffens, the denial already on her lips when suddenly someone screams:

"Dug!"

It is only due to Cosima's quick reflex that the bludger does not hit Delphine straight in the face instead it shoots past them, ripping the air like a cannon ball, disappearing into the murky clouds above them. Sarah is right behind it a flash of red whizzing past them, barely above their heads:

"Look where you hit that _effing _thing_!"_ Cosima screams at her not really caring if her twin hears her or not.

With a worried look she turns to the French beside her:

"Hey, you okay?"

Delphine is slightly pale around the nose, her hair standing up as a scarred cat's would:

"That was close. Thank you." She sighs, a hand placed over her heart.

Cosima cannot help herself if she is honest she barely could for weeks now, dying to touch those golden strands of hair, so she puts a hand through them, carefully so it does not turn into a caress.

"You look funny." She whispers, forgetting where they are, not caring whether someone of the people that are with them look or not, marveling at the way Delphine's hair falls back around her face in soft curls, slipping through her fingers.

Delphine peers up at her, biting her lip with the upper line of her teeth before she admits:

"I can't control it. It does whatever it wants."

Cosima thinks her heart must stop any moment, seeing the foreigner bite her own flesh makes her abdomen coil tightly, prompting the Ravenclaw to secretly press her thighs together. If Delphine kept on being her obliviously adorable self this morning might turn into a real test of patient after all.

Internally she slaps herself so she does not melt into a puddle right there, concluding that mindless flirting was easier than actually thinking about its implications, picturing that it was the appropriate music to the dance they were currently performing.

Her fingers comb through Delphine's locks briefly until she twirls one of them around her index finger:

"I really like it." She murmurs around a bold smile, stretching the second word on forever.

She finally feels less awkward around Delphine, eventually able to be her more relaxed, bolder, flirtier self, sure that ultimately she can make this girl, which is so agonizingly close now, they breathe the same cold air, see the want that already must be blatantly visible on her face.

Recognition glimmers in Delphine's rich brown eyes that are clouded with embarrassment and something Cosima definitely wants to be a mirror of what she believes the blonde sees in her own, darker eyes.

"I can see that." Delphine smirks probably all too aware of the affect she has on the geeky witch.

The Ravenclaw feels her cheeks burn under the smoldering glare the other girl gives her, enjoying the fire it ignites in her belly more than a good joint, smoked hidden away under the bleachers on lovely spring days.

However their little moment gets suddenly interrupted by loud cheers when down on the pitch Harry Potter declares this year's Quidditch team for Gryffindor. Due to the fact that Beth, Paul, Cal and Art all applaud loudly and Helena hoots and dances, standing on her seat with her hands above her head Cosima deduces that Sarah made it into the team, again.

"Go, Sarah!" the Ravenclaw howls towards her sibling, receiving two thumps-up in return and a broad grin.

"Man I hope she aims those stupid bludgers at some Slytherins next time and not the audience." Cosima laughs.

"Come on. I want to congratulate your sister." Delphine says.

This time it is her who grabs Cosima's hand.

* * *

At dinner they sit together with the rest of the Quidditch team albeit a little to the side, chatting about Gryffindor's chances at winning the cup this year.

"We totally have it in the bag this year!" Sarah shouts happily high-fiving with Cal.

"Don't be so sure about that, Manning. Weasly looked like he was ready to puke all over his nice uniform." Beth objects being a chaser herself for Huffelpuff.

"You're just scared we'll kick your asses." Sarah retorts good-naturedly.

Delphine was silent during most of the cheerful conversation, staring in wonder at the four girls all having the same face as the one sitting next to her, observing them, studying their differences so she hopefully never mistakes one for the other in the future. When she catches Beth's comment though she asks bewildered:

"Manning? I thought your last name was Niehaus?"

"You did tell her nothing, did you, Cosima?" Rachel says from a couple of seats away:

"Thank God my name is neither Manning nor Niehaus."

At this Delphine looks even more confused:

"I don't understand."

Allison pats her arm:

"That is quiet okay our sister tends to forget that others not know who we are."

Cosima washes away the rest of her dinner with some pumpkin juice then fully turns to Delphine, one leg on either side of the long bench.

"I got it, I got it…I'll explain." She starts slapping her hands on her thighs once before they go flailing around in dibs and turns to underline her following words:

"So…as you see…we're identical twins…born uhm…I the span of a couple of hours if I remember correctly."

After approving nods from both Allison and Rachel she continues:

"As we were born a couple of months before Potter, the boy who lived and blah blah blah and shit was still really bad our mother apparently thought it was safer for us not to know anything about the magical world…and she kind of hid us."

"How did she do that?" Delphine questions face a mask of worry and concentration.

"She shipped us of to muggle families and we only learned that we're witches when we got our letters and Mrs. S. came to get us."

At Delphine's puzzled gaze Allison adds:

"She's our foster mom. We live together with her in Tinworth."

"Yeah…still not happy about that." Beth complaints from beside Allison.

"What? Why…I don't…" Delphine mumbles trying to order all the information in her head.

Cosima is really close to say _awwww_ and pet Delphine's head:

"Okay…okay….listen…the two original twins everyone expected are punk-rock hoe and curly head over there."

"Hey!" they both protest in unison while Sarah additionally flicks a carrot at her dreadlocked sister.

"The three of us," Cosima motions between herself, Allison and Rachel, "we came more of a surprise. Ali was the first, then came Rachel and well…I'm the little chap…the duckling." The Ravenclaw finishes.

"The what?"

"The youngest one." Sarah yells.

Delphine looks like she is still processing but already draws a circle with her finger in the air:

"So where did you go…after your mother gave you away?"

Cosima clicks her tongue, swings her legs back onto the same side and says:

"Sarah Manning stayed in England just like Rachel Duncan but in different families hence the different last names. Allison Hendrix was send to Canada, that's why poor Beth is pouting because she has to leave her beloved country now to visit us, Helena went to the Ukraine but her family was a very awful choice in hindsight and I lived in Sanfran…uh…San Francisco….West Coast…you know USA and stuff ."

"When we turned eleven Mrs. S. came to our homes and brought us our letters to Hogwarts. Then we moved all in together." Allison brings the story to an end, one hand rubbing her still sulking girlfriend's back.

"Wow." Delphine lets out a long breath eyes drifting to all the twins but lastly they land on Cosima.

"Just wait until you get to know us better. We're awesome." Cosima tells her, all smiles poking the French's arm to emphasize her last sentence. For a second her eyes land on the enchanted ceiling, noting that it is the first time she sees Delphine in the hours of night.

* * *

**Sorry for any mistakes.**

**tbc.**


	7. Chapter 6

**Here is the next one. Kind of a filler. I promise the next one is better. Hope you enjoy. Feel free to leave a review.**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: As aforementioned**

* * *

It keeps going on for weeks now, testing Cosima's patience to the point where it is so tense and so thin and so wound up that it has to tear or splinter or explode, slapping her right in the face any day now.

She cannot keep going on like this, pretending that the she does not notice that Delphine touches her chest every evening, fingers between the valley of her breasts right above the golden pocket watch Cosima knows is hidden there.

It is fruitless to tell herself that she is not bordering on stalking the other girl every other day or that she does not feel a great bit disappointed that Delphine does not seem to trust her enough to explain where she vanishes to every night. She has to give the French some credit, though because Delphine's regret is true and her sadness heartfelt and she never tells Cosima a lame lie about why she has to leave, she simply does and Cosima marvels if Delphine's feelings really are so similar to her own.

She _has_ feelings there is no possible way to deny that anymore. The only question is: how deep do they already run? Are they skin-deep as fleeting and soft as a feather's kiss or do they linger, the feeling of a caress, of fingers brushing accidently, of secret glances that are louder than words? Do they make her blood boil and her atoms dance outrageously spurred by a lover's fierce kiss, do they make her tremble and shiver ferociously and scream at the top of her lungs with lust? Or are they already heart-deep, spinning a fine web around her heart protecting it, nourishing it and threatening it at the same time, carving a hole in which only Delphine can fit?

Cosima knows her feelings are many, woven, knotted and interlaced in a chaos as beautiful as the starry sky high up above her head but she has no knowledge about their depth, however, she is falling hard. And it is overtly written all over her face at least that is what her siblings tell her.

"Oi, where's your girl?" Sarah shouts at her on Tuesday evening during dinner.

"I dunno…and she's not my girl!" Cosima bristles, upset because she really does not know and because it gets to her like this.

"Whoa…calm down, Cos." Sarah puts her hands up in mock surrender.

"I assume you haven't made a…pass at her, yet?" Rachel questions barely concealing how much she enjoys Cosima's misery.

"No…Rachel…I haven't made _a pass at her_…ughhh…I hate you!" Cosima grumbles and buries her head in her hands

"Why not?" Beth asks before she accepts a mouthful of pudding Allison offers her.

"It is not that hard." Allison adds then stares lovingly at her girlfriend and kisses her cheek.

"Oh please, Ali, like you're one to talk! Remember all the drama we had to endure because of your gay-panic last year?" Cosima scoffs, the rattle of her bracelets rising above the general noise around them.

Beth gulps guiltily:

"She's right, baby, maybe we should…"

"Yes, yes maybe we should." Allison agrees immediately and they both go back to their dessert.

"But hey, seriously, Cos. Why not ask her out? You're hanging-out every day anyway and she totally likes you." Sarah says softly.

"You're so sure of that, hm? Hell I don't even know if she likes girls!" Cosima exclaims frustrated.

"And you'll never know if you keep on being a pussy." Sarah advises her.

Although Cosima scowls at her sibling deep down she knows that Sarah is right.

She does not like the secrets or the daily vanishing act or the feelings she is left with because of that but apparently that is not enough for her to not fall madly in love with Delphine Cormier.

* * *

By Friday Cosima lastly comes up with enough courage to ask Delphine if she wants to go with her and her sisters to Hogsmeade the next day.

"The weather is probably going to be shit and you'll freeze your ass off…by the way…we're so gonna have an epic snowball fight…losers have to buy a round of butterbier…if the _Three Broomsticks_ is open, though and…" Cosima rambles on and on in one breath, sure if she just keeps talking it will be okay, because, no one stops a moving force but her breath loses itself somewhere in her lung when Delphine places a hand on her thigh right above her knee.

She is glad she can mask her sudden gasp as the long needed breath and hopes that she is not that obvious to the French as she is to her sisters. The small touch is enough to effectively shut her up and she gazes at Delphine with big hopeful eyes.

"I would love to go to Hogsmeade with you."

The blonde whispers, never taking her hand away from Cosima's leg, giving the Ravenclaw an almost heart-attack for the rest of their study-session.

* * *

Saturday greets them with a heavy storm in the morning and by mid-day there is so much snow piling up outside it is enough to rebuild the whole castle out of it. The little group gathered at the bottom of the stairs is clad in long coats, gloves and scarfs. Everyone is already there, even Art and Paul will go with them, except, of course, like always Cosima.

"Why does she always have to be this bloody late?" Sarah groans, alternating her glance between the stairs and the sky where already new clouds begin to convene.

"You know how she is, probably experienced on potions again in the dead of night and set fire to her bed." Allison flaps her hand.

Hearing this Delphine's eyes get big and fill with panic:

"She does what?"

Allison and Sarah grin, both used to their twin's many crazy experiments that tended to explode more often than being successful.

"Did she ever hurt herself?" Delphine askes clearly worried at which Sarah's grin spreads even wider because she was so right the other day.

"Nah…not really…she only destroys all the stuff around her." She laughs.

"Although," Allison interjects, "one time she scorched her eyebrows pretty bad."

"Sister looked very funny…like a little baby." Helena nods in agreement while she tries to squish Rachel's face between her hands which shrieks and slaps her hands away in annoyance.

Delphine looks like she might pass out if Cosima does not appear in the next two minutes all smiles and twinkling eyes and unburnt eyebrows. Sarah nudges her to take her mind elsewhere but then reconsiders:

"Yo I know we're all girls and this point is normally made by the older brother but I need to get this across now so pretend I'm her older brother." She says dead serious.

Delphine looks at her like she said the earth was flat so she simply continuous:

"If you ever…like seriously ever…make Cosima cry for whatever reason…I shit on them all…I'm going to kick your bony ass all the way back to France."

The girl in front of her does not say a word, mouth hanging open in astonishment, looking more than a little spooked what makes Sarah immediately proud of herself albeit she hopes the day when she has to make her threat come true is so far in the future that she already forgot about it then.

Suddenly their eyes are drawn to the stair where eventually Cosima appears, all but flying down the steps, bouncing between several students like a superball, so close to ending up in a heap of red and green and blue on the stony ground that Delphine holds her breath until she skidders to a wobbly halt in front of them.

"Finally!" Sarah cheers and throws her hands up in the air.

"Always late. Always sorry." Cosima greets them slightly out of breath not looking sorry at all.

"What is your excuse this time?" Rachel wants to know as they slowly make their way out of the castle.

"Prof. Sprout kind of caught me while I stole some pot I had to make up a good lie." Cosima grins unabashed.

"But you still have it?" Allison asks hopefully.

Cosima pats the pocket of her coat proudly.

"You're such a brat." Delphine laughs and shakes her head at the Ravenclaw beside her:

"And that is why I like you."

"Seriously she uses it as an ingredient for sedatives…what a waste!" Cosima grins from ear to ear.

"What is a….oh forget it! Let's have a snowball fight!" Sarah shouts excitedly.

* * *

**tbc.**


	8. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the wait I got caught up in real life. As a humble peace offering I give you this chapter that's like double of what I normally upload.**

**This goes to The Doctor - Son of Kronos for his/her very niece review with a cherry on top. Hope you enjoy. **

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything Orphan Black or Harry Potter related. They belong do BBC America and J.K. Rowling**

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The cold biting air around them is heavy with sweet, hot smoke that mingles with the puffy clouds their breaths form above their heads. They are sitting close together on some rocks on a small clearing not far from the main path that leads from Hogsmeade to the Shrieking Shack, passing Cosima's bounty between them like a sumptuous treasure.

The small blunt hangs loosely between the Ravenclaw's fingers like it belongs there and she did it a million times before the guess can be considered only as a slight understatement. With a dopey smile on her face and full blown pupils she cocks her head sideways to glance at Delphine. Her nose and cheeks are rosy from the cold and her curious eyes rest on Cosima's hand:

"Want some?" Cosima asks lazily.

Delphine contemplates the offer for a moment, chewing on her bottom lip, then she shrugs and plucks the blunt from the other girl's fingers, her own brushing briefly against them:

"It is a Saturday after all." She declares before she takes a careful drag.

Cosima struggles with her body that wants to vibrate like an instrument under Delphine's touch, managing only a stiff nod in response. Being near the other girl reminded her more and more of being next to an untamed gorgeous animal. In the back of her head she knows that she should not touch or she would pay for her simplemindedness nevertheless the urge to reach out and connect is there and it is demanding, clawing at her steadfastness. Maybe getting high in the French's company was not such a brilliant idea in the end, though the relaxed smile that blooms on Delphine's face may be worth it anyway.

"So," Sarah starts between two long drags and an even longer slack smile, "who wants to make a team?"

"I want to be with you seestra!" Helena immediately shouts from her spot on the ground, sitting in the outlines of an unfinished snow-angel.

"Guess we already knew that much." Sarah sighs and rolls her eyes half-heartedly at her sometimes annoying twin.

"I'm with Beth!" Allison exclaims, earning dirty looks from both Cosima and Sarah.

"So not fair! She misses…like…never." Cosima complains, hands flailing wildly between the Slytherin and the Huffelpuff:

"I bet you cheat! Do you cheat?" the tiny geek continues.

Sensing an argument she has no nerve for Rachel intervenes by putting a gloved hand up:

"I think I decline."

Two heads whirl around while simultaneously Cosima's and Sarah's mouths fall open and they yell:

"You can't!"

"It's family tradition!"

"May I kindly remind you of what happened the last time?" Rachel says completely unaffected by her sisters' uprising.

It does not bring the desired effect because the two of them crack up instantly, their hysterical laughter piercing the peaceful silence around them:

"What happened last time?" Delphine questions Cosima who is leaning heavily against her with tears running down her face more or less unable to respond anything intelligibly despite tiny gasps and squeaks.

Allison who has a grin splashed on her face but manages it to look far more serious than her sisters takes pity on the foreigner:

"They accuse Beth of enchanting her snowballs and…well…they kind of developed a mind of their own."

"My fault," Beth chuckles, "they somehow started to attack everyone around me and followed them when they tried to hide or run away."

"Professor Flitwick passed us on a walk," Paul explains further, "Poor bastard got chased by Child's balls like they were some friggin bees."

"Let's get back to today guys!" Sarah chooses while she whips the last tear from her face:

"I'm with Helena," she gets interrupted by a loud cheer from her blonde twin, "Beth and Allison…never gonna change…and the rest?"

She gazes at the remaining teenagers with questioning eyes full of mischief:

"I'm up for kicking Child's ass…you're in Dierden?" Art says and looks at the Slytherin boy with raised eyebrows.

"Someone has to protect Rachel from you. Apart from Beth no one can throw a straight line." He states fishing out his slim, unbending wand.

Art shrugs and turns to Cal:

"And you buddy?"

The remaining boy scratches his already bearded chin and grins:

"Totally in. Let's show those girls how to win a snowball fight."

While the boys high-five Cosima peers at the girl next to her silently congratulating herself for getting high since the drug whooshing through her veins keeps her from acting like a love-drunk fool. Not that she needs it to be brave around Delphine or as an encouragement but it makes things easier, thoughts and feelings less chaotic, less jumbled:

"Looks like that leaves…"

Before she can finish her sentence an arm snakes around her waist and Delphine's hand shoots into the air:

"I'm with Cosima!" she proclaims loudly, the silliest laugh pulling at her lips.

Cosima thinks being a love-drunk fool might be exactly what she should be as she shares a goofy smile with her secret crush. Delphine really did not make it easy for the dreadlocked teen to keep it together with her sparkling eyes and lingering touches and smiles so radiating they are blinding, melting Cosima's resistance a little bit more each time she glances at her.

Good for her that Rachel stands up in one swift motion, brushing snow from her skirt:

"Then I will be the referee for this childish nonsense and Paul makes sure you stick to hitting each other."

Helena jumps up the next second:

"Let's go, let's go, let's go!" she chants, grabbing Sarah's hand and dragging her to one of the clearing's corners.

"Same rules as always!" Allison shouts happily while she bounces hand in hand with Beth into the opposite corner.

"What are the rules?" Delphine asks troubled as she chases Cosima to their own corner on the same side as Beth and Allison.

"We have ten minutes to build a wall that protects us and to make as many snowballs as we can. No magic allowed…but I bet Beth uses it so…don't get caught!" Cosima explains excitedly arms already full of snow.

"Uhm…Cosima," Delphine mumbles unsure, "I have a confession to make."

Looking up at the taller girl from her crouched down position in front of an already two feet high although narrow and loose pile of snow Cosima huffs:

"Yeah, yeah, come and help me."

Delphine drops down next to her and begins to pat the loose white powder so it sticks together:

"I never participated in a snowball-fight." She admits cheeks and hair a flaming red.

Cosima stops in mid-motion eyes wide with surprise:

"You never participated in…"

Delphine shakes her head, blonde curls moving too and looks rather embarrassed.

"I am sorry…if you do not want me on your team I understand." She murmurs looking everywhere but at the gaping girl in front of her.

She looks so sad Cosima's heart clenches and her hands dart forward straightaway enveloping Delphine's that are laying in her lap:

"Hey, hey why would you think that?" she queries gently: "I'd always want to have you on my team." She says and hopes that the French hears how much she means it.

"Really?" the blonde croaks out her ice-cold fingers slipping between Cosima's that are wet from snow.

"Of course." Cosima nods smiling from ear to ear giving Delphine's fingers a light squeeze.

"How come you never were in a snowball-fight? You don't have snow where you live?" she ponders, reminding herself of all the fun she had each winter and how terrible it must be to miss out on it.

Delphine does not look at her when she mumbles her next words:

"My parents…they did not let me…they had a very strict way of raising me."

Cosima stares at her completely bewildered for a moment not grasping the statement itself and the fact that the first thing Delphine tells her about her family is that her parents did not allow their daughter to have fun:

"Then they are buttheads." She concludes eventually.

The terrified expression on the French's face makes her giggle:

"It's about damn time you experience this essential part of childhood then."

Her smile widens when Delphine's full lips curl slightly upward:

"Can you teach me? What do I have to do?"

"Let's start with our fort." Cosima suggests playfully.

Ten minutes later there are two moderate walls of snow and ice, one small sloppy one and one that had to be higher than three feet separating the four teams from each other. Rachel is standing on a rock with Paul next to her on the ground ready to keep each and every misguided snowball away from his girlfriend and there is a tiny pistol hovering beside the blonde twin that once was a twig. It goes off with a loud bang and six faces red from hard work peep out from behind their makeshift castles.

"Oi! Look at that!" Sarah yells from behind the tiniest: "We said no magic, Childs! What the fuck?"

"Getting scared, Manning?" Beth yells back and sticks her tongue out at the fuming punk.

"That thing is effing huge! No way you've build that with your hands alone!" Cosima screams from where she stands halfway hidden behind snow.

"Yes, we did!" Allison defends herself and the Huffelpuff.

"Ali and I are the best, suck it up!" Beth roars before a lonely snowball soars past her, barely missing her shoulder.

"Hey, when did we start?" Cal bellows from behind the second moderate icy wall.

"Ugh…enough you morons!" Rachel shrieks at the top of her lungs silencing all of them with one vicious glare.

"Stop shouting! Throw snow at each other for Merlin's sake if it makes you feel better!" she growls and the next moment the enchanted twig explodes in another loud boom signaling the group that they finally could assault each other with their prepared snowballs.

The following minutes the air was filled with loud, happy shrieks, angry shouts and profane swearwords along with more flying snow than anyone could count, some of it wonderfully changing directions shortly before plummeting to the ground. It was every last bit chaotic and childish and hilarious since Beth aimed each throw carefully at her opponents always ready to dramatically dive behind her protecting wall and Helena did not bother at all how many hits she took to her parker as long as she could haul double the amount in every direction. Cosima launched into small victory dances every time she hit Paul who was hectically attempting to melt all the round shaped chunks of ice that flew in Rachel's direction while Alison let out a high pitched scream when yet another time someone hit her straight in the chest and the snow trickled down her chest beneath her warm clothes.

Delphine just earned her first score by landing a throw on Sarah when Cosima tackles her to the ground with full force sending both of them crashing to the ground with a loud thud:

"Uff…Cosima…what are you doing?" Delphine groans having trouble breathing with Cosima's weight on her chest.

"You hit Sarah…" she starts panting heavily, too then five or six snowballs explode on the trees behind them:

"No one…hits Sarah…unless they want to get killed by Helena." She chuckles, her face almost as red as her coat, her glasses crooked and dashed with melted snow her whole being shouting that she has the time of her life.

Then suddenly she is painfully aware of how close they are, her boots digging into the snow on either side of Delphine's knees, her fingers entangled with wet blonde locks that are splayed out around Delphine's glowing face, her legs trembling and tingling where they clamp around the other girl's waist and it leaves her breathless and wanting and terrified. Her resolve gets cracks and holes while it trickles through her chest, into her stomach, between her legs, forcefully creating a path of scorching heat inside her. Her heart is beating so violently against her ribcage it had to shatter any moment the sound booming in her head louder than the innocent screams around them, the French pinned to the ground must be able to hear it loud and clear. She already feels dizzy since she is too afraid to move a muscle let alone breathe when suddenly Delphine shifts beneath her:

"You are heavy." She whispers words smooth and dark and oh so low, not meant for such a meaningless sentence.

Cosima gulps down a mouthful of courage and bittersweet cold air:

"Sorry."

Then she lets out a tiny yelp when Delphine pushes her torso from the ground, sits up and plants two steady hands on the small of Cosima's back so she does not topple over backwards. Cosima is torn between wishing this would increase the distance between their bodies so she would not listen to the tiny voice in her head that screams at her to do something that could be both unbelievable brave or stupid and wishing she could touch Delphine wherever her greedy fingers could reach her to satisfy her urges, to make all the visions, all the made up possibilities of how Delphine would feel under the tips of her fingers come true.

Her first wish completely escapes her mind when she only slides closer to Delphine, hips bumping together, chests only a breath apart, Delphine's face so close she can see the golden splinters in her rich brown orbs and the want that ignites where her own groin is pressed against the button of Delphine's coat.

She could stay like this forever, on the brink of giving into everything that was Delphine, diving into her scent, her taste, her body and clinging to the almost insignificant part of her consciousness that holds her back from sailing off the edge but apparently Delphine steps back from her very own canyon in long, determined strides since the want that definitely was there only a second ago gets replaced with something much colder, much more distant and her hands drop from where they were curled into Cosima's back.

She stares at Cosima long and hard, says things Cosima does not want to hear with her big eyes and the wary smile and looks very much like someone who stumbled into a situation they never wanted to end caught up in unable to find an easy way out:

"Maybe we should pay her back?" Delphine eventually breaks the silence between them that is so tense Cosima does not know how it could possibly unload itself in a way that does not swallow them whole that does not shatter the ease around them to engulf them with choices they cannot turn a blind eye on.

Cosima only nods as she slides from Delphine's lap, waiting for her brain to catch up with her body, too bewildered and shocked to talk. Without thinking anything coherent, anything at all apart from how well she fit against Delphine, how kissable her lips looked, how much she wanted the other girl she gathers snow in her hands to prepare another snowball.

She cannot comprehend how Delphine is capable of shutting herself off from all the feelings that so easily manage to overwhelm her, leaving her confused and sad and maybe only a little desperate. Her mind is a million miles away when she stands up ready to throw the small ball of snow at whoever is closest, she does not see Helena or the three snowballs that come flying towards her at lightning speed or hears Delphine screaming her name.

The small white bombs hit her right in the chest, knocking the air out of her lung forcefully as she gets thrown backwards into a tree. She can barely keep herself upright, hand rubbing at the spots where she was hit, where she can already feel bruises forming, straining to get oxygen back into her burning lungs.

All of a sudden there is a cold hand on her face, tilting her chin up, on her shoulder burrowing in the red wool of her coat and Delphine's upset voice in her ringing ears:

"Mon Dieu, Cosima! Are you alright?"

She sounds hands-down close to crying and it makes Cosima wish that she had more control over what her body was doing on its own accord sometimes. She coughs and gasps and finally is able to meet Delphine's panic-stricken gaze:

"Still alive." She winces giving the anxious girl her best attempt of a smile. She tempts to fill her lungs with air a second time but fails and cringes:

"Damn…what did she put in those things…feels like friggin rocks." She pants.

"Let me see." Delphine says firmly, nimble fingers already working on opening her coat.

Cosima only registers that Delphine is close to her again, agonizingly close, far more worried than what she would declare normal with a concerned mask on her face. She still looks beautiful though, the concentration somehow sharpens her features, makes her look older, cheeks still red from their play and possible other things, hair a beautiful mass of tangled, golden locks and Cosima stares and discovers and memorizes it all in awe.

Something in her begins to calm while she finds herself on the brink again but the despicable thread that still connected her to the logic, thinking part of herself was worn thin, ready to snap. It did the second Delphine ripped her coat open and began to search for the opening between her scarf and her cardigan with shaking fingers:

"Why are you so worried?" she whispers calmly however Delphine does not hear her or ignores her since she pushes further between the many layers covering Cosima's naked, bruised skin.

Cosima exhales slowly, makes a decision and gently albeit rigidly wraps her own fingers around Delphine's wrist causing the other girl to halt abruptly like she just noticed that she is halfway to undressing Cosima against a tree:

"What are you so scared of?" she murmurs eyes boring into the wide ones in front of her.

Delphine looks like a deer caught in head-lights, her mouth slightly open yet no words escape her.

Cosima's fingers slide into the spaces between Delphine's, filling them perfectly, like they are meant to be there, like this is the place where they belong and it gives her a strange sense of confirmation.

That this was right, that she did not imagine the unyielding pull between them, that Delphine was feeling the warmth, the desire, the nervous, giddy happiness, too.

"Don't you think it's time that we admit what this is really about?" she whispers, one hand falling to Delphine's shoulder, to steady her, to anchor her to something real, realer at least than the pressure in her chest, the pounding in her head and her eyes shut on their own as she stands up on her tip-toes.

Delphine's sweet scent invades her nose while she leans in slowly, so very slowly to give the other girl the chance to back out of this, to bail and pretend this never happened or to claim her. Delphine smells like clean like water, soft and pure like spring flowers though there is something warm and heavy and earthy to it all. It is freedom and sun and protection and Cosima gets drunk on it.

Delphine's nose rubs subtly against hers, she can taste her hot breath on the tip of her tongue like a promise and she will never know what it was in the end, the pent up feelings, the fact that she is still slightly high, Delphine's sheer beauty or her desire she neither wants nor can hide anymore but when she eventually presses her lips lightly against Delphine's she goes flying off the edge with a roar.

Their kiss is incredibly soft, fragile and tentatively and to Cosima it tastes like fiery hope and sweet, sweet hunger for more and when she feels Delphine's upper lip pressing shyly against her own her heart explodes in million colorful flashes leaving her light-headed and dizzy and so full of feelings she was ready to burst.

Suddenly though she gets brutally ripped out from heaven and pummels straight back to earth when Delphine puts a hand on her cheek and pulls back, ending the kiss before it even began.

"I have to go…" she breathes.

Cosima's eyes fly open and something very close to panic washes over her:

"Did I make a huge mistake?" she stutters not liking how uncertain and doubtful she sounds when only seconds ago she was so sure of what she was doing.

"Non…" Delphine mumbles as she entangles herself from Cosima:

"It's okay." She adds.

"Delphine…" Cosima tries again but the girl already turned around, moving between the trees like a shadow and then she is gone.

Cosima's heart crumbles as she slides down the tree:

"I'm such an idiot." She mumbles and her fist connects painfully with the bark behind it.

She feels a lot like she wants to cry.

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**tbc.**


	9. Chapter 8

**Hey there again. Here is another chapter. Big thank you to the reviewers and the followers! Hope you enjoy!**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: Like always.**

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Two days passed since she kissed Delphine in the snow and to Cosima's misery the sensations that struck her then have not subsided yet, not even a tiny bit. They mixed with her blood, are somehow a part of her now, enter her lungs, her heart, her brain and race together with millions of erythrocytes and leukocytes through her arteries and veins.

It is close to torture knowing what heaven tastes like only to be brutally reminded that she most likely will never get the chance again to be even remotely close to Delphine Cormier's lips and it is her own damn fault. One she frankly will never regret because even if Delphine hates her now and never wants to see her again she still tried and for regret the whole disaster was far too sweet, too mind-blowing, too glorious. She feels sorry, though for the way her headlong boldness leaves her a little hurt, a little lonely and very much rejected.

At breakfast her twins tried cautiously to lift her spirits.

"She'll come around, Cos." Sarah said gently.

Cosima slouched a bit more in response, her upper body resting on the table, head hiding in the crook of her elbow while she made her pitch-black coffee spiral slowly out of her cup:

"So much for your theory that she likes girls." She grumbled as the coffee sloshed back into place. She could feel Sarah's uneasiness more than she saw it nonetheless she knew it was there plainly visible on her sister's face.

Alison sat on her other side and was, if possible, some more awkward:

"Did she…well…you know…" she was incapable of finishing the sentence and left it to Cosima to fill it with reason. Her slightly stiff sibling questioned if Delphine had been angry flat out insulted her or slapped her glasses right from where they had been perched on her nose.

"No…she didn't." Was her curt answer. It was the first time she actually realized that Delphine had not reacted at all like she anticipated if things went down the drain. She had not looked disgusted or ashamed or something only slightly close to that but outright aghast in, in Cosima's head that is, the not-bad-way if that was possible at all, more in the this-was-not-supposed-to-happen-way and a very stubborn part of Cosima viewed this as a clear sign that Delphine had to be aware one way or another of the crackling electricity that always sparks between them when they touch, of the hammering heartbeat and the inviting warmth and the overall need to be closer.

Delphine divines this bond that spun itself between them a bloody red, pulsing string, she feels it, has to, can most likely see it when she looks at it from the right angle while it draws them inevitably closer, she experiences its existence with every single one of her senses just as much as Cosima does, the Ravenclaw concludes and because she does she wants to cut it off probably too scared by what could happen when both the bond's ends meet. The only question is: What is it that makes Delphine so horribly frightened that her only solution is to hastily retreat from Cosima?

By now it is just another mystery she can add to all the others that surround the French like hazy fog through which she can catch glimpses of the girl that is shrouded by it and she ponders if Delphine actively controls the bits and pieces she grants Cosima. The dejected teen had been convinced a couple of days ago that she could live with it all however things changed and the constant question that wiggles itself into each and every of her thoughts since Saturday, all the way into her dreams spells it out that she indeed cannot.

She feels ashamed by it regardless she is glad to some very twisted extend that something, an entirely different kind of disturbing, happened when she went back to school with her siblings and friends on the weekend. They still wanted to go to _The Three Broomsticks _although Cosima was in no mood for a butterbier when they spotted Katie Bell and her friend Leanne coming their way, the former clutched a black package to her chest and they were involved in a heated argument. Cosima was too focused on keeping her frustration at bay to bother with them but when several gasps and shrieks erupted around her, her eyes snapped up, too.

Katie Bell was floating several feet above them, mouth agape in a silent scream then she crashed back down in a twitching, convulsing bundle. Of course Harry Potter and his two best friends were not far and the boy that lived was just about to pick up the package Katie dropped when Hagrid emerged from behind the trio and yelled at him to only touch it with the black, silken cloth it was previously wrapped up in.

When Harry, Hermione and Ron followed Hagrid to the castle their little group was hot on their tails albeit in a little distance. With help from the Weasleys' _Extendable Ears_ they eavesdropped on the conversation between Snape, McGonagall and the unfortunate trio of friends. They did not hear everything but enough to conclude that Katie was cursed, that it was bad and that Harry was convinced that it was Malfoy's doing. Sarah immediately was in complete agreement with her fellow Gryffindor but Cosima internally sided with McGonagall. It was a serious accusation that Malfoy was a _Death Eater_ and worked for you-know-who even though the spineless Slytherin would fit the role perfectly.

On the one hand Cosima is honestly worried for Katie Bell who has been brought to the hospital wing and not yet returned on the other she is oddly relieved since it gives her something else to rack her brain over, something utterly unrelated to Delphine.

All this leads her brain to go into overdrive, the kind not even pot can slow down and makes her think about everything but her _Transfiguration_ homework that lies abandoned, suffocated under her squished between her elbows and the table surface. She is tugged away into one of the far corners of the library, curled up on a lonely chair at a lonely table not feeling like listening to Sarah's unproven though, technically not arbitrated heated accusations or Alison's constant whining about how things like cursed students do not happen in a place like Hogwarts. She mostly wants to be left alone and so far no one approached her table so when she hears light footsteps she tears her gaze away from the window and turns it to the endless line of bookshelves in the other direction.

To her surprise it is someone quite familiar who is leaning barely three steps away from her hiding spot against a bookshelf.

"Delphine…" she breathes startled.

The blonde looks coyly, hesitantly at her, giving off the feeling that she is not really sure what made her seek out Cosima in the first place; if she really wants to be here or if she contemplates whether the Ravenclaw wants her there or not:

"I hope I'm not disturbing you." She half asks half says after a moment.

All at once there is too much energy in Cosima's coiled body, the by now intimate pull rustling to life, that she is standing, hands whirling through the air to support what splutters out of her mouth:

"Oh no. No no no no. Never."

When Delphine takes a tentative, small step towards her she rambles on:

"So apparently I got this thing for like…uhm…jumping to conclusions."

"You know...it's just that I...never…" Delphine starts and stops halfway through her poor explanation with wide eyes and hunched shoulders.

"I know…I know...you're not…you're not gay…and I'm a total idiot." She hurries to apologize in some way not for the action itself rather, maybe just to make Delphine stay instead of scramming away. Delphine nods her head, makes her curls bounce and Cosima wishes it is because she thinks she is an idiot and that her smile would not look so tight lipped, so vexed so misplaced on her face.

"So sorry…I just want to…" Cosima stutters, the words _be with you_, _get to know you_, _keep you_ already in the hollow of her mouth but she fights them back down, instead she settles for something less drastic:

"Make like totally crazy magic with you." The small laugh that escaped the French rings in her ears like tiny bells induces hope into her against all better judgment as her own lips morph into a smile.

"I am glad to hear that," Delphine states and rummages in her bag, "I just got our assignment for _Transfiguration_. Maybe we could do it together?"

"Sure. Would love to." Cosima answers pushing back the unpleasant memory that Delphine was not in class with her this morning, being wholeheartedly happy and glad that she could possibly have Delphine as a friend at least.

Currently it seems like it is all Delphine has to offer her and Cosima takes whatever she can get and hopes sincerely that it is going to be enough.

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**Now hopefully with less embarrassing mistakes.**

**tbc.**


	10. Chapter 9

**It's 3:30 a.m. and I really need to go to bed but dear Ehpoca this is for you. For the very nice review and for sticking to the story. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Big honest thank you to technically everyone who takes their time to read this!**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: OB and HP bla bla not mine...BBC America and Rowling bla bla bla theirs.**

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It was getting more and more obvious that Delphine was struggling with pretending that nothing happened between the two of them. Cosima genuinely was not that surprised, considered herself even somewhat lucky since Delphine did not scream bloody lesbian at her in the corridors nevertheless the turn their relationship took was fifty different shades of unpleasant.

On the rare occasions when they meet in the library Delphine sits across from her, out of reach for Cosima's itching fingers, silently, nose buried in several different books on advanced transfiguration. At first Cosima tries to make casual small talk, jumps from assignments to _Potions_ to _Herbology _desperate to bring back the spark in Delphine's clouded eyes, the passion with which the other girl normally responded, though it seems to be for naught.

Delphine's answers, if they are verbal at all, not limited to mere hums and nods, are curt, mostly one-worded, nurturing Cosima's notion that the blonde is a million miles away, anywhere than here with her.

Throughout the following days the Ravenclaw geek notices that not only Delphine's mind evidently escaped her rather the girl as a whole is fading away right in front of her eyes. Her hair actually is a mess languidly and knotted nothing like the golden, glowing mane Cosima is used to, her normally warm, deep brown eyes are dull and strangely colorless skipping from a line in her book they do not see, to Cosima's face until she gets caught, to the window, back to Cosima, demonstrating just how jittery she is, how restless while the dreadlocked teen fails to completely convince herself that it is not because Delphine truly is not okay with being around her. She is nearing plain denial when it strikes her that the French becomes more and more like a ghost, that she gets paler almost every day making the dark circles under her eyes unsettling prominent, that she comes late and leaves early, vanishes into thin air and stays untraceable for the rest of the day.

Rachel and Allison tell her that Delphine stays in the Slytherin common room this week, though she is a scarce guest around the fireplace, nowhere to be found when her two twins settle in their beds and already up, up and away the next morning.

Cosima sees all this, knows all this, is painfully aware of the distance Delphine creates between them which feels deeper than the _Mariana Trench_ but she has no courage, no bravery to ask Delphine why she keeps tormenting herself and it tears at her heart with wet, sticky fingers. She takes whatever she can grasp, too selfish to risk that Delphine tears the pathetic remains of their bond into blood-red shreds.

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Her heartache propels forward into a new dimension when Delphine rejects kindly, politely, in five sentences which is the most she said to Cosima in days, the Ravenclaw's offer to sit with her and her siblings during the first Quidditch match of this school year. Between uncomfortable and weary she looks honestly sorry before she leaves without a see-through lie on her lips not even giving Cosima the satisfaction to be angry at her. Delphine does not openly lie to her, at least not that she is aware of, she simply does not tell and Cosima has trouble deciding whether that was better or worst since neither is the truth.

The match is Gryffindor versus Slytherin a Hogwarts classic in gold and silver, red and green and one big, grand, terrific win for Sarah and her teammates due to Ron surprisingly ruling the pitch in front of the three rings and Harry unsurprisingly catching the snitch.

Everyone is already celebrating the lions' epic success in the Gryffindor common room while Cosima walks across the now deserted Quidditch field, relishing in the calm after the storm and in the resinous, tenacious aroma of her pot, tempted to empty her head of all thoughts.

It works agreeable well, until she winds through the bleachers to shorten her way to the castle and two voices drift to her ears from not very far away. It is the first that makes her dive behind a wide column. She almost did not recognize it because she never heard Delphine be this cold and dismissive and it sends a chill down her spine:

"I don't know what you're talking about."

She has to stifle a gasp, in pure Allison manner, when she recognizes with whom exactly Delphine has a secret meet and greet:

"You're lying! You were sent by them to help me!" Draco Malfoy screeches, voice doubling over in anger and Cosima swears she hears a tint of panic:

"I don't need your stupid help! I need no one's help! He chose me!" he shouts getting louder and louder.

"I am not here to help you, Malfoy. I do not care what he chose you for and I do not care about you. I am here for my own reasons." Delphine answers menacingly calm, words colder than ice. Cosima is shivering where she is hidden in the shadows, hands clasped tightly over her mouth so her silent whimpers are not heard by the arguing duo. She does not want to hear this, whatever it is, whatever it means; she is not supposed to know.

For a couple of moments the air around her is silent and she almost thinks the two left when suddenly Malfoy bellows:

"Screw you, Cormier! You and your fucking family!" The she hears gravel scrunching and this time he is leaving for good. Delphine stays behind muttering something in French while Cosima is too scared to breathe:

"Casse-toi idiote." Delphine screams at the top of her lungs out of nowhere and Cosima moves her hands from her mouth to press down on her ears. She does not want to hear this.

* * *

Cosima wants nothing more than to forget what she heard, it is the only understandable reason for her to drink so much fire-whiskey that her bed was more of a carousel in the early morning hours but she keeps mulling over the information she involuntarily received nonetheless. Even with a pounding headache she understands pretty fast that Malfoy plots something indeed and that someone specifically selected him to do so. She does not ignore the possibility that you-know-who was that someone though the idea is so distressing that she reverts to Snape a not necessarily better option but definitely less scary.

That conclusion was the easier to make while the other tears her up so much she would be thankful for the first time ever in her young life if she could erase the memory well and truly from her brain. The first thing she declares for herself as truthfully is that Delphine does not collaborate with Malfoy, that she is not part of whatever he is planning and that she has no notion what it might be. But she is in the loop on something and that alone makes Cosima question what exactly the other girl kept from her since day one.

The milky sunlight casts blurred light into the small greenhouse where Prof. Sprout hides her female _Cannabis_ plants and where Cosima currently renews her stash. When the door behind her creaks, her heart stops and curses tumble helplessly from her quivering lips:

"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!" she silently chants while she hastily grabs all her belongings and shoves them into her bag. She whirls around, so sure to find her teacher standing behind her with a furious expression that her heart stops all over again, gets coughed up into her throat, climbs into her mouth when the person she comes face to face with is neither an adult nor furious.

"Holy fucking mother of fucking Merlin." Cosima gags, bracing herself against a table as her heart slumps back into her ribcage.

"Je suis désolée. Sorry. I did not mean to scare you." Delphine says softly, standing in front of the closed door, hands buried deep in Cosima's favorite black coat, hair for once tamed in a forbiddingly cute bun.

"Try again next time." Cosima mutters bitterly, catches Delphine's slightly hurt expression before she retrieves her yet half-empty pouch and continues to fill it with buds. She hears how Delphine comes nearer, hears her boots on the dirty floor and feels her eyes burning holes into her back.

Eventually she sighs and turns back around:

"Why are you here?" Her voice is flat and admittedly a bit cold but she is angry, why, she is not really sure, maybe because Delphine does not tell her shit or maybe because she does not seem to trust Cosima with any of it or because she runs away from her own feelings, hides them away somewhere where Cosima cannot reach them. In the end her pent up frustration releases itself in her tone and in her posture and in her will to not be fake okay today. She leans back, waist pressed against wood that is warm, heated up by some floating flames above them, her arms are crossed tight in front of her chest and she hopes her face looks as stoic as she wants to.

"Because I…" Delphine starts, halts herself by biting her lip, just the right way to make Cosima's legs feel like someone hexed all the bones away:

"Because I'm sorry." She says finally.

Cosima raises an eyebrow in response although her determination already begins to crumble. Delphine has a way of melting Cosima, molding her into a silly, giddy, grinning fool. She is already working her magic with those damn puppy-eyes and that damn lip-biting so Cosima mentally slaps herself to stay focused.

Probably Delphine interprets her silence as a sign to go on:

"I have been an asshole." She mumbles while she steps a little closer.

Cosima shrugs, nods, shifts from one foot to the other and keeps her mouth shut not letting Delphine of the hook so easily:

"I am sorry for…being away so much…and not paying attention…and…and…and." There she stumbles over her words, squeezes her eyes shut, inhales, exhales, visibly tries to grasp the correct words, opens her eyes again:

"Merde, Cosima…Je suis désolée parce-que j'ai te blessé. I hurt you and I'm sorry…" she huffs, seemingly frustrated with herself and the whole situation and Cosima believes her.

She does not doubt that Delphine is sorry for the way she behaved the last two weeks but she is still angry and hurt because Delphine still is rigid, stiff, in a flight or fight position looking every bit like she is about to bolt out into the fresh air again.

If she lifts her arm she can touch Delphine's now and when she does her theory gets proven since the blonde cringes and flinches like she carries some deadly disease. Her arm falls limply to her side and she does not even try to hide the snarl in her tone:

"It's not contagious ya know?"

Delphine has the audacity to look puzzled at her, head cooked to the side with big questioning eyes and Cosima scoffs:

"Me, touching you doesn't make you gay, Delphine!"

Realization dawns on the French's haggard face as her eyebrows draw together in a frown her own voice shaking with emotions Cosima did not expect:

"You think that is what this is about?"

Cosima throws her hands in the air which speak for themselves in twists and dibs and turn using an exceptional pictorial language to make Cosima's emotions visible somewhere else than on her face, transferring them from inside to the world around her, to Delphine:

"Yes! That's exactly what I think!" she shouts, makes the glass vibrate, makes her frustration audible in her voice, makes it visible with her hands which slam against the table surface:

"For the last two weeks…you…you couldn't stand to be only in the same stupid room with me! You…you kept me…so far away from you…you needed a bloody stick because arms-length wasn't enough!" she goes on, being on a roll now, riding her anger like a wave.

Delphine is getting riled up herself now, Cosima sees it in the deep lines which become visible on her forehead, how tight her jaw is set, how cramped her fingers look buried in her skirt:

"If you hated the kiss that much then why are you still here?" Cosima demands to know, she thinks she has a right to know, she definitely has.

Suddenly something breaks in Delphine, something like a barrier, a wall that hid all the emotions, kept them in check until now. Something raw and wild brings back all the thousand colors to her eyes and ignites a fire in them which grows and grows until her eyes are smoldering black pools of something that Cosima's innermost part reacts to.

She blinks and then Delphine is onto her like a storm with hands and lips and teeth, so ferociously, so fierce it makes her dizzy, gasping for a breath Delphine stole away from her, pushing and gripping with wandering, frantic fingers under which Cosima's skin comes alive in shuddering waves. Her lips are warm and soft yet so vehemently unyielding, they are bruising, nipping on Cosima's bottom lip, wandering to the corners of her mouth, to her jaw, tasting every patch of skin she can reach.

Cosima responds with equal desire, with sheer abandonment, throws her arms around Delphine sinks her fingers into golden locks that spill over a creamy white neck, rakes her short nails over Delphine's skin, pulls her, commands her to be closer. There is no air left to hold on to nonetheless her breath evaporates into oblivion when Cosima feels Delphine's tongue dance across her bottom lip in an untamed hungry rhythm barely able to wait for permission.

Cosima gives it to her, readily, willingly and instantaneously, opening her mouth, inviting her with long, broad strokes her own desire to taste too overwhelming to give Delphine any time to explore Cosima with her tongue.

Delphine is liquid lightning in her arms, a gorgeous, mighty force of nature striking Cosima with hands that anchored themselves to her hip, spreading Delphine's erratic pulse all over her skin, burning her by trailing bruising lips from her chin, to her jaw, to the spot behind her ear while the hot breath she ghosts over her flushed skin causes not only Cosima's knees to buckle and her arms to tighten around strong shoulders but to almost flying off the edge. The blonde paints herself to the roof of Cosima's mouth and Cosima is reduced to breathless moans and whimpers which make her whole body shake.

Delphine's lips come away with a wet pop immediately followed by Cosima's pleasantly tingling ones though the blonde gently bumps their foreheads, brings a hand to Cosima's face, to cup her cheek, to cradle her jaw, leaving barely enough space between their aching mouths for words:

"This is how much I hated the kiss."

Cosima crushes her lips back onto Delphine's with an urgency that is born from her desire to be swallowed, swept away by a kiss which Delphine loves.

* * *

**BTW Delphine tells Malfoy to: Piss off, asshole!**

**If you're French and my translation is wrong please correct me!**

**tbc.**


	11. Chapter 10

**Hey there again! Here is the next chapter...I'm really awkward with writing make-out "sessions" or smut so I'm a bit anxious but here you go. BIG thank you to Ehpoca I'm feeling so honored for what you said and your reviews make me happy ;) Also...welcome new follower!**

**Hope the rest of you enjoys!**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: Like always**

* * *

„You're sure, you never did this before? " Cosima gasps around eager, hungry lips, against teeth sinking into the flesh of her own bottom lip roughly. She's writhing from the sensations the cold glass of the mirror she is pressed into and the pleasant, flickering heat Delphine's fingers, which glide over her thighs, her waist, pressing boldly against her taut stomach, create in her.

Delphine angles her head, purrs against Cosima's open mouth:

"Non…not with a girl." Then she surges forward again, catching Cosima's groan between her lips, her tongue wraps itself around the sound, to savor it, caress it with playful strokes. Her longing for Cosima is severe, insatiable even, today, making Cosima lightheaded because every breath she gets to suck into her lungs she has to share with the blonde, showering her face with sweet butterfly-kisses which leave Cosima aching for when her mouth returns to hers, making the Ravenclaw arch her back forward, away from the tinged mirror, into Delphine's pulsing desire.

"I practiced with boys, though." She pants, words ghosting over Cosima in a whisper as they fill their burning lungs with much needed oxygen to not pass out. Then she is peppering Cosima's neck with kisses, nipping on the patch of skin under which Cosima's pulse thrums like a drum, flicks her tongue over it drawing the most primal sounds from the other girl. She doesn't give herself the luxury of a deep breath, not today, not when she can reach every part of Cosima's body, not when time is too precious to be wasted on words.

Cosima's arms snake around Delphine's neck trapping her between the crook of her neck and the curve of her shoulder and while she sees stars bursting in a sea of gold she groans:

"That's hard to imagine…Delphine Cormier…practicing kissing."

And it's the truth since Delphine's kisses are like art, her mouth and tongue and teeth her tools with which she splashes all her feelings on Cosima's willing body. Her colors and patterns are the way she angles her head, switches from feather-light touches to long, sensual, deep strokes, they are soft nips on Cosima's tingling skin, sensual licks right under Cosima's ear, rough, possessive bites on Cosima's collarbone.

Cosima knows what good kisses are like, experienced their alluring call and that you can easily lose yourself in them, thinks herself gifted enough to leave people breathless and mind-blown but Delphine's kisses are, compared to all that, exceptional at the very least and so out of her league they play in another galaxy at the best, like _good kisses_ are the earth in the milky way and _Delphine's kisses_ are each and every star and planet in the Andromeda galaxy.

"I am a fast learner." Delphine murmurs, breath skimming over Cosima's bend neck, over the peak of her shoulder, down, down, down the curve of her spine. Cosima is close to falling apart perched there on a sink, in a toilet on the third floor with Delphine standing between her legs, pressed against her in all the deliciously right places so she gently pushes against the blonde's shoulders, to give herself enough space to remember that this is not the place to come undone like her body wants her to.

Though her mind comes to a standstill when Delphine's half-lidded, coal black eyes bore into her, her fingers almost automatically wrap around Delphine's tie to yank her back:

"Damn right." Cosima rumbles and crashes their mouths back together, fingers skipping over opened buttons, between openings in the French's neat button-down where the buttons are still intact, pressing into flushed, warm, vibrating skin.

Something irritates her though, makes her separate from Delphine's addictive taste, because the vibration, that travels from her hand to her wrist to her elbow is too fast, too hectic to be a heartbeat, then Delphine feels it too and groans:

"Merde."

She puts one hand against the mirror, right above Cosima's shoulder to steady herself while the other fiddles with the fine, golden chain Cosima wished would disappear from around the French's neck.

With a sigh and a sudden pressure in her chest Cosima accepts that this is the end of Delphine kissing her senseless for today and the beginning of another lonely evening with bitter thoughts on where Delphine has to run off to every time.

"Putain de merde!" Delphine curses frustrated while she steps away from Cosima, buttons her shirt all the way back up and tempts to tame her hair in which Cosima wrote a dozen words with her hands. Cosima on the other hand falls defeated against the glass behind her and tries to not feel so upset:

"I am so sorry, chérie." Delphine says while she fumbles with her tie dampening Cosima's uncomfortable disappointment momentarily with the term of endearment only to reinforce it with her next rushed words:

"I completely forgot but I have to…" Cosima interrupts her with an irritated huff:

"Yeah, yeah…you have to go…I know."

Since Delphine, very colorfully, showed Cosima that it wasn't a sexual identity crisis that made her distance herself from the Ravenclaw, a couple of days ago in the green-house her daily routine hadn't changed much. She came to _Transfiguration _again the other morning and spend every free minute kissing Cosima silly in the library, in the dark corners of lonely corridors or in the girl toilette on the third floor but whenever the sun began to set she had to rush away in a flurry of muttered French and repeating apologizes, leaving Cosima with a bad feeling in her stomach and a chaste good-bye kiss.

"Every damn night you have to go and you can't even tell me where or why." Cosima grumbles with crossed arms barely keeping herself from glaring daggers at the, still looking rather disheveled, girl.

Delphine sighs exhaustedly and steps between Cosima's legs again, hands on Cosima's arms which responds by leaning further back into the wall:

"J'ai te dit, ma chérie, I cannot tell you."

Cosima rolls her eyes:

"And that's supposed to be enough to make me stop wondering?" Delphine's guilty expression sends a pang right into the Ravenclaw's heart:

"It has to be for now."

"What if it's not?" Cosima questions with raised eyebrows and hands held at either side of her chest.

The way Delphine's eyebrow's knit together, her eyes go wide and her mouth pulls into a pout make it all too clear for Cosima that the blonde doesn't want to imagine what happens if the dreadlocked nerd is right. She weaves the fingers of one hand through Cosima's, who lets her even though she is troubled and cradles the brunette's jaw with the other:

"Cosima…You are…très important pour moi…and I…I want to give this," she motions between them with the hand that is not interlocked with Cosima's, "I want to give us a chance…I really do mais…I can't answer your questions, now."

"I want that, too." Cosima responds with a quiver in her voice: "But I don't see it happen. Not with all your…sly shit in the way." She finishes, reclaims her hand and scoots as far as possible away from Delphine. Delphine's shoulder slump and her face gets hidden by strands of golden light when her chin drops to her chest and she keeps silent for so long that Cosima mumbles contritely:

"Maybe you should go."

Instead of following her suggestion the French surprises her:

"I will tell you…everything you want…when the time is right."

Her words are not enough to make her heart unclench albeit they reduce the pressure so much that Cosima can breathe again:

"And you're gonna decide that all alone…the right time?"

Delphine shakes her head and murmurs quietly:

"It is not me…who gets to decide…it's McGonagall."

"What?" the geeky Ravenclaw asks bewildered: "Why?"

Delphine contemplates struggles then shrugs:

"She has a more…general view on the whole situation…I really want to tell you, Cosima…but she knows when it will be safe enough to do that."

"Safe enough?" Cosima shrieks, hands clamping down on the blonde's shoulders making Delphine wince slightly, hating every single meaning Delphine's words could possibly carry.

"Calm down…it is okay…they help me to keep the danger away...nothing will happen." Delphine attempts to sooth her fears, places gingerly kisses to the side of her head, caresses her back in gentle strokes after Cosima put her forehead against her sternum and buried her hands in her shirt.

"It is okay…" Delphine repeats gently as often as Cosima needs to hear it to calm her frightened heart:

"It's okay…" she eventually mumbles and lifts her head to look at the blonde: "Just remember to come back to me."

Then she cups Delphine's face with both her hands to draw her closer and covers the blonde's full lips with her own in a sweet and loving kiss. When she opens her eyes again Delphine smiles at her so wide, it seeps into her own orbs, intermingling them with amber dots:

"Always."

The promise, one that can be never truly kept, echoes still between the white tiles, even long after Cosima is left alone in the room, straining to not give into her anger, frustration and fear.

* * *

**Considered the time it took me to write this...this is way too short. Well, if you're interested I'll likely wrap this story up in 25 chapters total...so stay tuned! :)**

**tbc.**


	12. Chapter 11

**New chapter, yay! Greetings to the new followers! Hope you enjoy, don't be shy and leave a review, I would love some :)**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Orphan Black or Harry Potter. They belong to BBC America and J.K. Rowling**

* * *

December came accompanied by heavy, long snow storms and gloomy, grey days that were hardly distinguishable from the bitter-cold, dark nights which often cause Cosima to long for her foster mother's warm, brightly lit living room, where she can spend hour upon hour in front of a crackling fire, sinking into the comfy couch while her mind drifts and sashays aimlessly through the house.

Of course, there are magnificent fireplaces in Hogwarts too but they lack this certain secure aura she only experiences with her family. She loves her house, really does, how challenging the riddles can be for someone like her, who is not a great philosopher, at least sober, the hunger and passion of her fellow Ravenclaw's for knowledge, the common room, so high up above the rest of the school it's a suitable place for their heraldic animal, and the colors on their crsst and generally the things Ravenclaw stands for. But even though this is her home for most of the year, it doesn't always feel like it. Ravenclaws usually are quiet, dedicated, ambitious people which keep to themselves and stick to the rules. In contradiction to Cosima which likes to be queer and silly, to turn strangers into friends with a single broad grin, tongue poking out from between her teeth, who bends rules until they fit her needs and ignores them all together if they don't. She is a little different than the others with her love for muggle science and girls and although no one ever called her out on it she gets enough silent looks to imagine that not everyone is truly as accepting as they pretend to be.

The only other kid in her house with whom she has a closer relationship is Scott. He's cute in his own way, smarter than he gives himself credit for and whilst he is pretty much into Cosima since their third year, he manages it to stay a really nice guy. Neither with him, though nor with any of the other students she wants to sit in front of this comforting fire that doesn't quite chase the chill out of her bones with its blazing flames in bright orange and ruby red.

The person she wants to lean into, instead of the backrest, has been abducted hours ago by unknown commands to foreign places Cosima can only hope are still within the castle.

* * *

Delphine's secrets are still secrets not about to be revealed anytime soon and they take a heavy toll on Cosima's meek patience filling her heart with anxious worries and her head with grim frustration and defeat. She is more of an instant gratification type, even with her experiments at home, she checks on way too often due to her impatient vigor, even when she sits in the library, battling with the horrendous amount of _DADA_ homework Snape dropped on them and demands the kisses Delphine promises her if she finishes her work in advance, pointing out that they'll boost her motivation.

The kisses, Delphine grants her every time she asks for them, demands them boldly, intentionally right before the blonde leaves her yet another time or when she doesn't even know she wants them, when her body seeks them unintentionally, drunken on sleep in the middle of the night when Delphine returns to the bed they started to share not so long ago. Albeit the secrets stay secrets unsettling, mocking Cosima so much that she is close to chaining Delphine to the bed every morning when she has to leave for her first class.

Although Delphine never actually told her the times when she has to meet with McGonagall, or who knows whom, Cosima crafted herself a pretty clear picture of her schedule. In the morning she is given the benefit to sleep in, something Cosima definitely envies her for, giving the blonde the opportunity to wander through the castle when everyone else is trapped in class.

Occasionally Delphine uses her free-time to walk with Cosima from one class to the next, to bring her books she forgot in the hurry of dawn or to tell Cosima that she stumbled headlong into a secret passage while she ran away from some Slytherins whose shoelaces she hexed together. After Cosima's last class, before the afternoon, they share lunch with the other twins and during that time Cosima can pretend they are like a normal couple.

During the brief hours they get to spend after the Ravenclaw's classes finished, relaxing, with Delphine's head in Cosima's lap and her fingers threading through blonde hair, on a couch in the Ravenclaw common room, Cosima is already dreading the moment when Delphine's pocket-watch begins to vibrate. The geeky girl observes that it doesn't come to life at the exact same time every day.

On Tuesday it started to move against Delphine's creamy white skin the second Cosima's nimble fingers finally, finally managed to open the last button of the French's blouse at 6:15 p.m.

On Wednesday it woke Cosima with a start from a nap she had taken, with her head resting on the taller girl's shoulder, startling her so much that she almost tumbled out of Delphine's embrace and their shared armchair at 7:00 p.m. and yesterday it disturbed their heated discussion on the perfect measurement of the ingredients for the _Blood-Replenishing Potion_ at 8:30 p.m_._

* * *

Cosima thanks Merlin and the couple muggle gods she knows that today is a Saturday and that means Delphine is allowed to stay with her the whole day.

Currently they are in the _Room of Requirement_ which is a nice addition to Delphine's presence because it was seldomly unoccupied these days and is one of the few places Cosima knows where members of different houses can mingle. The rest of Clone Club, a name Beth came up with in their second year, explaining it by saying:

"You know…if I didn't knew you five were twins I'd bet you were clones!" is scattered around them.

They wished for the room to look like a common room with plush couches, a couple of love seats, a small table on which rest several pairs of feet and a roaring fire which illuminates their relaxed faces with a soft glow.

It is the last weekend they get to spend all together before Christmas break, apart from Helena who chose to visit Hagrid because his giant spider friend Aragog was sick, and they are discussing their various plans:

"Man I bet Fee has grown another couple of inches since summer…one day the kiddo towers over all of us." Cosima yawns and stretches like a lazy cat in summer's heat.

"Can't wait to see the little shite." Sarah grins from ear to ear, bouncing in her seat with excitement over seeing the little boy again who is like the brother she never had.

"Make sure you give him a big fat bear hug from me." Cal rumbles next to her, wraps his arms around his girl and squeezes until Sarah yelps with laughter.

"You're not coming with us?" Allison turns to him with raised eyebrows.

He shakes his head along with his long hair:

"Nah…sorry, my dad and I, we're going to spend Christmas in the cabin. Said he finished renovating it and…guess he just wants to spend some time with me."

"And you?" Allison asks her girlfriend alarmed.

"Course I'm still coming, baby. Right on Christmas morning, I'll be the first present you'll unwrap." Beth chuckles suggestively and puts an arm around the Slytherin's shoulder.

From across them Rachel scoffs:

"Please make sure you do that in her room and not downstairs. Your amount of PDA is disturbing."

"Yeah…like you're one to talk. Gave the neighbors quite a show when you shagged Paul in front of the window." Sarah sniggers and is joined instantly by the rest of their group. Paul buries his face in his hand and mutters:

"I'm never doing it in front of a window again."

"Well, certainly not this Christmas." Rachel agrees stiffly, shifting uncomfortably on the couch, cheeks tinged with red due to the roaring laughter around her.

"Why? Ms. S. gonna kick him out again?" Cosima wheezes after she calmed down a bit.

"No…" Rachel mumbles looking uncharacteristically downcast, "he will not come with us this time."

"Oh...I have the feeling Felix will be a little disappointed that you will not run half-naked through our house during the holidays." Alisson smirks at a rather embarrassed Paul.

"Ali! What the hell!" Sarah gasps: "He's way too young for that shite!"

"Just saying." The prim twin answers, hands up in mock surrender.

"It's not like that…he's still a damn kid, Paul." Sarah tries to convince him.

Paul shrugs:

"Yeah…it's okay…it's not that…I'm going to visit my parents in Afghanistan…they got relocated there as chancellors for the ministry."

"Oh okay…okay." The punk sighs, relief all over her face that Paul is not annoyed by Felix' innocent admiration then she focuses her attention on her geeky sister and the foreign blonde:

"Oi, Delphine!" she calls.

Delphine which has been only half listening to the conversation around her, happily peppering Cosima's palm with innocent pecks, looks at her expectantly:

"Quoi?"

"You two are officially rolling in the hay now?" Sarah motions between the two of them.

Delphine looks puzzled at Cosima who is sitting in her lap with one arm around her shoulder and index finger twirling golden strands:

"Qu'est-ce qu'elle a dit? A roll…in…hay? "

Cosima giggles at her adorable expression and brings their interlocked hands closer to her chest:

"Sarah…wants to know…if we're dating." She drawls out, absolutely loving the way Delphine's skin and hair colors a crimson red.

"Oh…oh…" she squeaks so embarrassed she has to hide her face in the crook of Cosima's neck.

Her voice is so low that only Cosima can hear her whispered, scared words:

"I'd really like that, Cosima but I don't know..."

Cosima immediately understands what Delphine is talking about and it takes her about two seconds to decide what she wants. She places a hand on the fine curve of Delphine's jaw and makes her look up, bumps their foreheads softly and mumbles:

"Me, too."

"Really?" Delphine wonders hopefully with a shaking voice.

"Mmmhmm." The Ravenclaw hums and rubs her nose gingerly against Delphine's:

"I want to trust you…it's not nice or easy…but I do." She mumbles with her lips so close to the blonde's she can feel Delphine's sigh dancing upon them and then Delphine kisses her firm and sweet around a light laugh that makes Cosima tingle.

They grin widely at each other, mirroring their giddiness and gleeful happiness before Delphine turns to Sarah:

"Oui, we are rolling the hay!"

Rachel groans, muttering something about gay-genes while Sarah and Allison cheer and Beth gives Cosima a rather awkward, upside-down high-five.

"Anyway…what I really wanted to know: You're coming with us or you're going home to France?"

Hearing this Delphine stiffs in her arms and Cosima internally cries at how fast the full-blown smile on the French's face is replaced with a sorrowful scowl:

"I am not going back to France." She mumbles, says _France_ not _home, _eyes falling down to her hand that still is entwined with Cosima's:

"I am supposed to stay in school…but," she continues, searching Cosima's face with unsteady big eyes, "I really want to come with you."

Cosima damns the person and the circumstance which lead Delphine's free will to be taken away from her and damns Delphine, too a bit because she led it happen. Cosima sighs, tired of how shaky the ground is on which she and Delphine attempt to balance their fragile relationship, gulps down her second thoughts and gives the blonde a reassuring smile:

"Ask her, okay?"

Delphine's head sinks to her collarbone and she feels her breathed words ghost over her skin:

"Thank you."

"Uhm…so?" Sarah queries with raised eyebrows while Cosima doesn't really know how to answer when suddenly the door bursts open and Helena enters the room covered all over in milky, white spider-webs and arms loaded with pumpkin pies and an old, kinked wizard chess board:

"I have food…Who beats me gets a share." She announces and plops right next to Alison on the couch which shrieks loudly and cowers into Beth's body.

Cosima is thankful for the commotion her older twin sets in motion since now she doesn't have to explain the whole complexity of Delphine's situation, whatever it actually is.

* * *

On the next day, during lunch, Cosima is greeted by her girlfriend, the term giving her bittersweet chills, with arms that wrap around her shoulders from behind and an over-joyed, enthusiastic kiss to her left cheek:

"She said yes."

* * *

**#savecosima**

**tbc.**


	13. Chapter 12

**Hey guys, new chapter :) Sorry for the wait but real-life caught up with me and watched Inch'Allah that reduced me to a sobbing mess for a while. Hello to the new fellowers! Hope you enjoy, leave a comment.**

**Ta-Ta**

**Disclaimer: As before**

* * *

The window is pressing painfully into her back and she is sure that her thighs became completely numb during the last hour, though, she doesn't mind that much. Cosima's weight, that presses her further into her seat, is not suffocating, more like a blanket which keeps her warm and her restless fingers that write invisible words on her shin are engaging Delphine in their own personal conversation even though Cosima is not looking at her and her other hand is flailing wildly through the air, jabbing a licorice wand at Sarah which sits across from them together with Cal and Helena.

Cal and Helena are leaning against each other, mouths open, emitting peaceful snores. They have fallen into, what Cosima labeled a food-coma, after betting who could eat more chocolate frogs and now Sarah and Cosima are arguing about the cards of famous wizards and witches the two dropped carelessly to the floor. From their heated discussion Delphine merely understood that Cosima was set on getting _Theophrastus Bombastus Paracelsus'_ card and didn't buy it that she had to give her very uncooperative sister her precious _Cliodna _and _Tilly Toke _in exchange.

Delphine doesn't care much for the conversation since she is too enchanted by the girl shifting and fidgeting in her arms however she makes no motion to move away from Delphine's hands which rest on the slim line of exposed skin where the Ravenclaw's wide sweater has ridden up, massaging tiny circles around her slightly prominent hip-bone.

Her eyes are wandering over Cosima's numerous dreadlocks, pondering on how awful it must have been to get them, picturing the cheeky girl without them and deciding that it was impossible. She stops now and then on her journey to marvel at the various beads and pearls which are carefully plaited into the thick brown hair, the one of painted wood in blue and silver behind her right ear, the fragile, almost see-through shell which rests on her left shoulder and the ceramic pearl which is right between her shoulder blades that is painted in shining, moving colors which remind Delphine of a stardust.

Each and every day she discovers something new and astounding on her favorite Hogwarts' student that makes her halt in her movements, keeps her breath in her lungs and she stares openly, mesmerized until Cosima moves and hides what Delphine is so desperately trying to burn as vividly as possible into her mind.

Cosima is everything to her but the person she imagined falling for with such fierce abandonment that it sometimes scares her during that brief period, in which the very late night turns into the very early hours of morning, while she watches Cosima sleep completely vulnerable, ripped off her glasses, her make-up, her sass everything that keeps her somewhat apart from Delphine, protected.

She never felt this strongly for any person before in her live and she wonders if she missed this ferocious hurricane, this connection and repulsion of emotions which leads to eruptions so powerful they send her soaring, all this wonderful, gorgeous sensations because she never met the right girl or because she never met Cosima.

The first time she saw her Delphine was already under her spell, drawn to her like a moth to the flame, falling head-over-heels, pushed over the edge by her sanity and her reason, not caring that she might crash and burn to ashes when she reaches the ground and half the time she thinks she left her brain too, on that cliff, because she barely knows what she's doing anymore. She's so torn between the mess, which seems to consume her whole life like a slow, deadly disease, keeping Cosima as far away as possible from it and telling and giving Cosima everything she wants, to finally take the sadness away from her that creeps into her eyes, into her forced smile, into her stiffened posture. Delphine wants nothing more than to be the reason for Cosima's broad, wide smiles, for her belly-deep, full-blown laughter but instead she makes her sad and angry, the worst thing, though, is that she can't change it.

She doesn't deserve Cosima, not when she keeps so many things from her, maybe not ever and she dreads the day when Cosima comes to realize that too more than the worst outcome of her mission, that she spends every moment she has with the dreadlocked girl solely focused on her. She is too deep in this now, too far gone to entangle herself either from the reasons that brought her to Hogwarts or from Cosima and by spending the holidays with her girlfriend and her family she maneuvered herself only into deeper shit.

She is, by all means, how the Americans call it, fucked.

"Hey, you okay?" a concerned voice suddenly ends her depressing train of thoughts.

Her head jerks up from where she had unconsciously placed it against the Ravenclaw's shoulder and she comes face to face with Cosima's worried expression, eyebrows drawn together and head tilted a little to the side. Delphine gives her a small smile, one, she hopes, hides the commotion on her insides and mumbles:

"Oui, chérie."

Ponders when calling Cosima like this became so easy, so natural, then adds:

"I am only a little nervous."

Cosima is almost frowning at her, a look that doesn't suit her at all, at least not when directed at Delphine, albeit she became its target way too often during December's gloomy afternoons:

"Why that?"

She's shifting between Delphine's legs, sits up, shuffles closer and swings her legs over Delphine's left one and looks at her with big, hopeful eyes that say _please don't shut me out again._

No matter how much she wants to tell her everything, she can taste the lie already on her tongue, bitter and coppery and foul, though it is not an actual lie, she _is_ nervous after all:

"I am going to meet your mother." She says, smiles shyly at the girl in front of her, chewing on her bottom-lip, something she always does when she's nervous or aroused, although right now it's because she feels insecure.

Cosima looks at her like she didn't understand a word while Delphine embarrassedly goes through her sentence again searching the one word she apparently misused once again then her lover's face clears and Delphine receives a silly smile:

"It's only Ms. S. She's cool." Cosima waves her off with soft jingles.

Delphine shrugs, not sure whether the Ravenclaw understood why she feels rather reluctant to meet the older woman:

"Yet, she is someone you love…and someone that loves you."

Cosima stares at her so intensely that it makes Delphine's skin prickle for a moment before she snaps her fingers:

"You are scared that she won't like you!"

In response the blonde squirms in her seat and nods vigorously, like a little child.

Cosima's eyes soften, the color of melted caramel, as she gives Delphine a tender kiss on the forehead:

"She'll like you…she can be hella creepy sometimes and a little mean…but she trusts me and I…" Cosima's voice faded away before she can finish the sentence, lips pressed together, teeth grinding, struggling to swallow the words, Delphine craves for, yet knows she will not hear, back down.

"I want you there." She whispers finally and tears at Delphine's heart nonetheless because even that is more than she deserves.

* * *

When they get off the train, trunks trailing after them, clad in their muggle clothes, along with hundreds of other Hogwarts students Delphine is very close to reproducing the chocolate frog Cosima made her eat so she would calm down, she can practically sense the enchanted sweet coming back to life in her stomach.

It makes it a little difficult to navigate through the mass of people around them but Delphine is immediately flooded with relief when Cosima's hand slips into her own and she gets tugged along. Sarah and Helena are ahead of their little group which formed when the formerly lost twins joined them together with their other halves. Cal already had to leave them because his father is rather impatient on meeting him. He barely had time to kiss Sarah good-bye.

While Delphine tries to slow her raging heartbeat she recognizes a high, childlike voice with a very dominant English accent floating atop the bobbing heads of the families around them:

"Sarah! Here we are! Here!"

Sarah responds, yelling at the top of her lungs:

"I'm coming, monkey!"

Then she ploughs through the crowd like a bulldozer, completely ignoring the angry complaints around her with Helena hot on her heels as the others follow in a more relaxed pace. As they close the gap separating them from the little reunion, Delphine views how Helena is giving a tall woman with long reddish brown hair a bear hug. Her alertly eyes are the color of an Irish lake in summer and the lines, which traverse from her slender nose to her mouth and across her forehead, make it clear to everyone that she is someone who experienced first-hand that life wasn't always rosy.

Right next to her Sarah is embracing a little boy, whose feet are dangling somewhere around Sarah's knees while she twirls him around, both laughing in pure glee.

Alison greets Ms. S.; at least that is who this woman had to be in Delphine's opinion, with an embrace and a kiss to the cheek while Beth offers her a very formal handshake. Paul is welcomed the same way whereas Rachel merely gives her a nod.

Apparently the twins' foster mother is someone to better be treated with respect and Delphine's heart drops somewhere between her feet when Cosima abandons her to throw her arms around the older woman to squeeze the magic right out of her. The blonde's hands become unpleasantly moist with sweat as she watches her girlfriend and her foster mother interact:

"How has my favorite little geek-monkey been?"

"Ms. S.!" Cosima whines with balled up fists: "You can't call me like that anymore!"

"Why is that, love? In September you had no problem, yet." Ms. S. hints in a smooth, low voice which is coated in the same accent as Sarah's and Rachel's. "Could it be that you don't want to be embarrassed by me?" She continues with an amused twinkle in her blue eyes.

Cosima snorts and flaps her hands wildly:

"Ehhhh…I don't get embarrassed."

Delphine actually has to cover a smirk with her hand as she hears that, remembering all too well how the confident Ravenclaw sat with her in the library, face the color of an overripe tomato, her blush increasing whenever Delphine caught her staring. This is not the library, though, not even school anymore and Cosima is surrounded by people she loves and most of them she trusts with her life and it makes the blonde smile a little at how at ease the _geek-monkey_ is.

"Hold on a sec….two seconds." Cosima moves her hands, flattens her palm against the cold air, stretches her index finger then skips the barely four steps to where Delphine is standing stiff and tense, wearing an excited grin:

"You're ready?" she asks while she already reaches out for her girlfriend's hand.

"Oui…I think." Delphine replies wondering if she would have ever been ready, ever is ready for Cosima.

"Ms. S. this is Delphine Cormier…Delphine this is my foster mom Siobhan Saddler." Cosima introduces them to each other.

"Enchantée…It is a pleasure, Mme. Saddler." Delphine greets her politely and is surprised by the woman's firm handshake, conveying to her that Ms. S. is welcoming her for now into her home but just as fast can kick her out again:

"You found one with manners, I'm impressed, Cosima." Ms. S. chuckles at her and Cosima beams:

"Unlike that one." she sighs and turns to where Beth is pressing Alison into a column, hands suspiciously out of sight. The next second the Huffelpuff yelps as she gets clobbered upside-down her head by a flying newspaper:

"Keep it in your pants, Childs or you're sleeping in the attic." Ms. S. warns the blushing girl while Alison groans and hides her face between her hands.

* * *

During their ride to Tinworth they are all packed into a magically enlarged Mini which Delphine, at first sight, thought of as a joke, since eight people and six trunks could never fit in a vehicle this tiny.

Hence she is honestly surprised at discovering that they have plenty of room, which she is grateful for, for the simple reason that she gets to sit next to a window in a row with Cosima and Helena and can both at, least partly, out-tune the sniffles and hiccups Alison emits since Beth said good-bye to her and pretend she didn't see the forced emotionless mask Rachel wears with tense determination since she brushed off Paul's attempt of a good-bye by entering the car first.

On the short trip Delphine learns that muggle cars, even the enchanted ones, are her least favorite means of transportation. While squeezing through between two red double-decker busses, jumping lanes and racing through the heavy traffic of London at break-neck speed was already bad enough she was fairly close to fainting when the car's engine roars, loud like a pack of angry lions, the car itself hops, one, two times over the narrow country road and the next second they are flying.

The French is not a person comfortable far away from the ground, wasn't born as someone who wanted to touch the stars, was probably never mend to fly, she is more of a grounded person, connected with the churned, loose earth beneath her feet, the humidity of plants greeting her like an old friend. That is another reason why she was so enamored with the girl beside her, whose hand she is most likely crushing in her death grip, Cosima is warm and soft like a meadow, colorful like a sea of wildflowers, energetic, intelligent and, in all honesty, the essence of everything Delphine loves about the forest, wrapped up, incarnated in her small body.

She is not someone designated to be far from any of this, thus she is the first out of the car, the moment the tires touch the ground.

Bitter-cold asphalt scrapes at her knees as she tumbles momentarily to the concrete since her legs appear to be made of jelly. Cosima is by her side immediately, helping her back up, apologizing for the bumpy ride, mumbling:

"Remind me to never ever ask you if you wanna play Quidditch with us."

At first her sight is slightly blurry but as the dizziness fades, the house in front of her comes into focus.

The first thing she notices it that it's old, made of faded bricks, caught somewhere between brown and grey and that it gets somewhat odd and crocked the further her gaze climbs up the front. The door is more of a small portal, framed by dark wood, to the right a semi-circle interrupts the otherwise rectangular architecture. The first two floors overhang a little above the front door and are dominated by large windows while further up the house seems to shrink, continuing in surreal angles all the way up to the skew, pointed roof.

Right next to the entrance, which they all try to pile through at once, sways a wooden sign, bearing the words _The Birdwatchers_ and a tiny bird, bustling on a branch.

The instant Delphine steps over the threshold she likes the place which, without further inspection, can be identified as the pub.

The whole room is revetted with dark, smoky wood, a bar dominants the left side with dozens upon dozens of different shaped and colored bottles lining, sagging the shelves behind it. Her eyes wander to the right, to the semi-circle, where a small podium ascends from the cobble-stoned floor on which several instruments lie peacefully on a couple of bar stools. The wall is made of colored glass and Delphine imagines the breath-taking play of light and color which the sun would cast into the room on a less clouded day. The walls in the main part are littered with moving photographs, paintings and posters, creating an impressing mosaic of the pubs history mixed with Ms. S. personal taste in art.

While the twins all dump their trunks in front of a crackling fire Delphine stays behind, paralyzed by her admiration for this house, which is so unlike the one she grew up in:

"This is really nice." She tells Ms. S. in a breathy sigh.

"Thank you, dear," the older witch responds with a kind smile then she turns to her fosterlings:

"How about I prepare some butterbiers and two mugs of extra creamy chocolate for Felix and Helena while you lot take your stuff upstairs?"

"That'd be hella rad!" Cosima answers for all of them as three trunks simultaneously rise into the air whereas Helena simply clamps it between her arm and her chest and Sarah brandishes her wand so violently while she says _Wingadium Liviosa_ that her trunk repeatedly hits the wall instead of levitatinglike the others.

"Bloody hell!" Sarah curses loudly, kicks her trunk, which in response springs open and spits out Sarah's clothes.

"Language!" Alison scolds her as she walks past her grumbling sister and vanishes through a wide sliding-door, trunk hovering by her side like a well-trained puppy. Rachel stomps after her instead of helping her older twin unlike Helena and Felix who collect Sarah's trousers and socks whereas Cosima is mocking her fuming sister:

"Jeez…Sarah…that's like a spell for first-years."

Then with a smile that could illuminate every corner of the great hall and wriggling eyebrows she turns to Delphine:

"You're coming, chérie?"

Laughter bubbles up in Delphine's throat as she flicks her wrist, a non-verbal command towards her own belongings to follow her, due to Cosima's terrible attempt of pronouncing the word the same fluid way as the French.

She gives her girlfriend a playful smirk as they step into a narrow corridor:

"We, _ma __chérie_, have to seriously work on your French."

Cosima gives her this smile that is all tongue between her teeth, dimples and twinkling eyes that the blonde loves so much, while they ascend a broad wooden staircase to the second floor:

"I'm always up for learning new things."

Cosima's room is on the second floor, facing a large garden and Delphine swears she sees water shimmering in the distance and it particularly screams _Cosima_ wherever she looks.

Books and papers are cluttering the floor, clothes are piling up in front of a wardrobe, are scattered on the rumpled sheets of Cosima's bed, which is so big that is takes up almost an entire wall, the one which is divided by two windows half hidden behind heavy dark curtains.

A large desk occupies most of the space that is left between numerous bookshelves which is littered with even more books, empty vials and other small trinkets though the most outstanding things is a strange lamp which contains two lazily moving liquids in neon-blue and yellow. Although the couple of feet tall, moving model of a double-helix in the far corner is quite rare, too. The only wall that is not hidden behind a shelf is plastered with Da Vinci's Vitruvian Man.

"Maybe I should have cleaned up a bit." Cosima tells her sheepishly, one hand rubbing her neck.

"No…no, no. It is very you. It's nice." Delphine reassures her with a smile so wide it makes her cheeks hurt.

Then Sarah is banging on the door to call them downstairs.

* * *

The following days Delphine gets to spend more time than ever with Cosima and the sinister things she left in Hogwarts seem so far away she does not think about them at all. Even less when Cosima wakes her up with lazy kisses in the morning, holds onto her for dear life as they go ice-skating with her sisters and little Felix on the lake behind the house and sets her body on fire in the middle of the night with hungry hands which carve a million bittersweet promises into her.

* * *

**tbc.**


	14. Chapter 13

**Hey guys, firstofall I am so sorry for the hiatus and THANK YOU so so much for following and reviewing and favoriting ( is that a real word?). Most of the time I think people don't bother with this story so again, thank you, I love you! I know this chapter is not much, though I still hope you enjoy it. I got caught up in a lot of real life stuff and had almost zero time for writing. Additionally I got saved from drowning in Cophine feels by a ship named Vauseman and yeah...I got a little occupied with that and hit by a lot of One-Shot ideas. Well, I won't abandon this story, don't worry but I don't know when I will be able to update again.**

**Enough said. I hope you read, enjoy and review :)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

* * *

Sunlight is warming her face, the earth soft beneath her weightless body. The air is frozen in infinity, filled with a silent void and a deep fulfilling peace hums gently through her empty mind. Everything is blissfully calm, leaving her needlessly happy, relaxed, without a thing amiss to complete her state of seldom balance between head, body and heart. Suddenly the faint flapping of wings disturbs her, somewhere out of her vision, which she tries to ignore. The rustling fades away only to be replaced by an annoying tapping, tugging unpleasantly at her consciousness. She wants it to die down, to leave her in this otherworldly place, where she can exist carelessly. The sound is persistent, though, repeating itself in unsteady intervals, growing louder, demanding even, the longer she avoids it.

The next second Delphine cracks her eyes open, unceremoniously being dropped back into reality.

The warmth and the, bordering on numbness, relaxation pass the border with her between dream and another dingy morning, one she preferred to leave her alone for a couple more hours. It is still too dark for sunlight in the room full of shadows, the place she slowly falls back into, in this particular bed with this particular body moving in gentle inhales and exhales beneath her, too welcoming, not a thing in the world can pry her away from it. She is close to surrendering to her subconsciousness again, when the last thing, which danced the fine line between fiction and the real world with her, knocks forcefully on the forefront of her mind again and lastly pulls her back into the here and now.

Disoriented she needs a couple of moments to locate the irritating rapping, eventually does so and turns her body, still heavy with sleep, to the large window. An owl is sitting there, waiting for her, impatiently rapping its claw or beak against the glass, large yellow eyes piercing the obscure distance. Delphine doesn't want to leave the bed, not the person, which sleeps on undisturbed right next to her; nonetheless, she has to because she knows this owl, not even her limited vision makes her doubt. She feels like cursing into the pillow and neck in front of her, instead she rises carefully from the rumpled sheets and prays that she doesn't step on anything on her way towards the waiting animal.

Released from its baggage the owl takes off immediately, probably to hunt in the early hours of dawn, leaving Delphine behind, shivering in the cold air. The cold wakes the trembling blonde further up, like a bucket of ice-cold water splashed in her face, while she, as silent as possible, unfolds the letter. The ink and the hand-writing tell her, that she was right in her assumption before she reads the short message as quickly as she damns it.

McGonagall tells her it is time. Time to tell the truth, spill; come clean to the slumbering girl a couple of feet away from her, not something Delphine is excited about, definitely not on Christmas morning. Foolishly she had believed that she could delay this conversation with her girlfriend until after the holidays, until they were back in Hogwarts, where Cosima could keep her distance easier than in her own home, where Cosima didn't have to kick her out to ignore her.

But the Ravenclaw deserves to know this and Delphine has no right to suddenly withhold it from her, not when she promised not even a month ago that she would be honest, not when she could be in danger.

Quietly the French sneaks back into bed, tries to enjoy that Cosima curls into her the moment she lies down, imagines that this could be the last time she is allowed to watch the girl sleep, to be merely close to touch her. Words of apology and reason already form in her head:

_I'm so sorry._

_You don't understand._

_It is not as bad as it sounds._

It's worse, Delphine thinks bitterly, staring at Cosima's peaceful face, knowing that this will be a long day.

* * *

A loud, happy shriek rouses the whole house from sleep a couple of hours later. Everybody knows Alison is responsible for that, though, nobody blames her, it is almost tradition by now that she does something similar every year, when Beth steps out of the fireplace first thing in the morning.

Except for the reunited duo, each sibling helps Ms. S. to prepare breakfast, apart from Rachel, which accompanies them to the kitchen because she is disturbed by that much affection, who vanishes behind the _Daily Prophet_.

The second, however, Beth calls for them to open presents, they all abandon the adult in the kitchen to storm into the main room of the pub. During the most important holidays it is closed, serving the large family as a living room, larger than the one at the end of the corridor, which links the pub to the rest of the house.

Next to a proper Christmas tree, bending under too much decoration, some clearly from days in which the twins were still younger, crackles a majestic fire, its flames dangerously close to four socks dangling from the mantel, which overflow with sweets.

Half-way through breakfast they all gather in front of the generous mountain of presents that billows from under the tree. Sarah hands out each and every package by passing them over, close to throwing them like a _Quaffel, _individually, while Delphine wonders how she never misses one of them, binged up like a goblin on a sugar-high.

More and more presents get revealed as the wrapping paper gathers around them until it covers most of their legs.

Sarah almost faints when she unwraps her present and holds onto a hand-made _Silver Arrow_ from 1931, still able to fly and in an excellent condition, Rachel actually sways a little on her feet as the others tell her, that when they come back from school in summer a muggle, someone called a carpenter, will have installed a second gigantic glass panel in her room, so she can stare out onto the street completely unimpeded as much as she wants.

Helena is completely speechless when Ms. S. and Sarah gently hand her a tiny kitten with reddish fur and big brown eyes, while Beth and Alison loose it a bit over each other's presents everybody else finds a bit cheesy. Delphine is touched to the point of happy-tears by the way Cosima stares in awe at the _Altimeter_, invented in the late 19th century by muggle, French, scientist Louis Paul Cailletet, cries some more when Cosima hands her two fragile looking books on really rare, really old transfiguration spells. Delphine can't believe that Cosima took notice, that almost each and every book she reads at Hogwarts revolves around that issue and that she gets a Christmas present for the first time in her life.

They spent the day lounging in front of the fireplace, playing with Grace, the baby cat, in the snow and with a half-hearted Quidditch game, during which Delphine stays on the ground together with Helena.

Little Felix and his parents come over for dinner, which is a feast, able to compete with Hogwarts' holiday-meals, answering Delphine's question where Ms. S. has gone to the whole day. The food is delicious in a way only that home-cooked with love can be, regardless, Delphine's appetite is meek, her stomach cramping up painfully, since she remembers what she has to do once everything is eaten up by Sarah and Helena, cleaned and put away.

She dreads the way this beautiful night is most likely to end, angry with herself that she is the one that has to ruin this for Cosima but there is no way around it anymore if she doesn't do it tonight, she will come up with excuses to postpone it even longer.

So when everybody starts to nod off in the living room, she asks Cosima, if she wants to take a walk around the lake. The air is crisp, too cold for snow, the night sky littered with million glittering stars, shining down on the two girls trudging through the darkness, holding hands. It is so romantic, it's unfair, Delphine reckons, then remembers that she is the unfair one by going to destroy this night with her words.

* * *

"Man…after that much food I need to smoke…I can't believe Helena ate the whole plate of cookies after dinner." Cosima muses beside her and pats down her coat for a joint. Delphine releases her hand and takes a couple of steps toward the shore of the lake, whose water is pitch-black, starting to freeze where it meets the land:

"Maybe you should not smoke right now." The blonde says, already struggling to go through with this, to keep the guilt and the shame from making her voice tremble.

Cosima looks puzzled at her, stops searching her pockets:

"Why not?"

Delphine sees that her girlfriend instantly knows that something is up, of course she does, she is the smartest witch she knows. The torn French takes a long, deep breath, the cold air sharpening her mind, focusing on the importance of what she is going to reveal rather than her fears and selfish wish to tell Cosima everything is fine:

"Because McGonagall send me an owl this morning. The time is right to tell you."

Cosima stiffens, visibly even in the faint starlight, creasing her eyebrows, the gears turning audibly in her head. After a long moment of loaded silence she says:

"Everything?"

"Everything." Delphine responds with a nod: "Whatever you want to know, I am going to tell you."

By now, she can feel how Cosima pulls away from her inwardly, how she hardens and braces herself for things she probably doesn't want to hear, just like Delphine doesn't really want to tell her:

"Why did you come to Hogwarts?"

The first question is already one Delphine will regret to answer honestly, one that needs explanation and she hopes Cosima will stay around long enough to listen:

"I am not a regular student at Hogwarts."

"That much I know already." Cosima scoffs, the irritation in her voice, stinging more on Delphine's face than the ice in the air around them. She sighs, wishing really, really hard to not have this talk:

"Cosima…you don't understand…" Even in her own ears she sounds patronizing and isn't surprised when Cosima snaps at her, she deserves it:

"Then make me!"

"I'm not a student at all…I finished school two years ago." Delphine declares, not able to meet her lover's eyes, not her face, which is a mask of confusion:

"You're right, I don't understand." The sound is teeth grinding, bristling anger, wrecked trust and Delphine is sure, that statement alone is enough to shatter her fragile relationship with Cosima. She would not need to say anything more to lose the girl in front of her; the girl she hoped naively would catch her at the end of her fall. Now, Cosima will presumably step aside to let her crash and burn.

"I will explain…just…s'il te plait…let me finish…" she begs. Cosima gives her only a curt nod in response.

"My parents are _Death Eaters. _When the dark…you-know-who…vanished sixteen years ago…they betrayed him…said that someone used the _Imperius Curse _on them. Now, that he is back they want to get back on good terms with him. They want me to be like them and sent me to Hogwarts as a spy…"

"I am so stupid." Cosima interrupts her seething: "How could you! Fuck you!" she screams and Delphine flinches under the brutality of her voice, her heart shattering helplessly:

"Please…please…just listen to me…" she sobs.

"Liar!" Cosima screams again, at the top of her lungs, raging, unforgiving, her tone sharper than knives, more hurtful than any curse could ever be.

"I didn't want to! I didn't tell them anything and I won't! I'm not like them!" Delphine tries to defend herself.

"Oh yeah? Then what did you do every night? Where did you go, if you didn't snoop around?" Cosima retorts, so angry that her small body is shaking, her normally gentle brown eyes spraying sparks.

"I only came to Hogwarts because…Cosima, I am not normal…and I hoped the teachers at Hogwarts could help me." Delphine admits defeated:

"I am a _Metamorphmagus._"

"Bullshit!" the girl she loves hisses at the blonde, chest heaving, breathe puffing out of her lungs in steamy clouds.

Delphine is aware that she sounds pitiful, that Cosima will not believe her only because of her words, why should she, after what she just confessed. So she gives in to the urge that clawed at her insides ever since the argument started, sometimes it is too hard to control and her compulsive behavior in stressful situations rarely made things easier for her, now though, it is the only thing she can think of so Cosima understands that she is not lying.

Pictures spark in her mind of fur and paws; the feeling of sharp teeth in her mouth, the scent of snow and Cosima's anger gets more prominent every second. She knows what she wants to be, what she wants to look like, it is her favorite transfiguration, one she already did a thousand times.

Cristal clear the image is in her head.

* * *

Cosima is speechless from anger, incapable to comprehend what Delphine just told her, deeply hurt by the betrayal and furious that the blonde has the audacity to lie in her face right now. _Metamorphmagi _ are an extremely rare kind of shape-shifting witches or wizards, so rare in fact that Cosima can only think of one person she knows to be able to do that and that is Nymphadora Tonks, definitely not Delphine Cormier.

Frankly, she is so convinced of that, that she tumbles to the ground when Delphine morphs seamlessly into a wolf in front of her eyes, that one in fact, which saved her on her very first day of school this year from Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle.

The animal, no Delphine, looks as breathtaking and stunning as when she first met her, intimidatingly tall, her fur shining silver in the milky moonlight, her eyes liquid amber and sadder than she ever saw them. As the beast comes nearer Cosima raises her wand in a reflex, so shocked by this new information that her brain cannot draw the line between wolf and human. Her hand, her whole arm trembles like a tiny twig in a hurricane the closer Delphine comes, if Delphine really is a _Death Eater_ she can kill her now, bite her head off, end her young life will end, for she is too frightened to think of a single spell that could keep her safe.

She squeezes her eyes shut, overwhelmed by so many emotions they get too big for her heart, they seep into her brain, making it useless.

Then soft tentative fingers touch her cheek and her eyes spring open again, big and wide with fear:

"When I was younger I couldn't control it…I came to Hogwarts because I heard of McGonagall. She and Tonks give me extra lessons in transfiguration so I can learn to use it. And they help me to make my parents believe I do what they told me." Delphine whispers quietly, kneeling on the wet ground in front of a stunned Cosima.

"I didn't mean to fall for you. I wasn't supposed to, but I have." She says her voice and eyes overflowing with sadness and guilt, the emotion, though, which brings tears to Cosima's own eyes, is love.

"How can I possibly believe that, Delphine?" Cosima chokes, fighting down the desire to simply believe the blonde and the voice of reason which tells her to stand her ground.

"Because this is not a lie." Delphine tries to reason with her, has a very valid point because what she feels, what she knows is there undeniably between them, is raw and real and cannot be made up:

"It's not possible." The blonde continues and somewhere in her hurt mind Cosima admits that it is not possible to fall so deeply in love with a fraud.

But Cosima is still angry because Delphine still kept this from her for a long time, still betrayed her trust and possibly even used her in some way. She wants to hold onto her anger, to live it out, so she can concentrate on what she is supposed to do now, when suddenly smoke, darker than the night falls down from the sky, hits the earth like a whispering gush of wind.

A booming, lunatic voice cuts through the night, one that reminds Cosima in its madness of Bellatrix Lestrange and makes her shiver for utter different reasons than Delphine's revelations:

"Oh sweet sister, come out, come out wherever you are!" the voice cuts through the darkness.

Cosima wants to grab onto her, keep her from obeying this order but she is already too late, as she turns her head back to where Delphine has just been kneeling the blonde already vanished.

* * *

**tbc**


End file.
